In The End
by You-Just-Might
Summary: What if Cammie got her memory back? Cammie, Zach and the gang have to stop the COC. The CIA is full of moles and turncoats so they are on their own. My version of GG6. First fanfiction. Sorry for the bad summary but please R&R.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N Hi everyone. So this is my first fanfiction and I'm kind of excited. I'll try to update every day or at least every other day. In the meantime enjoy. Please R&R. Any ideas, opinions or comments are welcome, good or bad. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Gallagher series or characters. All rights go to Ally Carter.**

_"No." I cry as a whip comes down again. "No."_

_Catherine laughs. "Really Cammie, just tell me what I want to know and this can stop."_

_"Never," I whisper as the black consumes me once again._

_When I regain consciousness again all I can see is the walls of my cell. I turn my head and see Catherine walk in. I start to struggle, trying to escape my restraints. I can't and even if I could, there is nowhere to run. She calls a man into the room, a gun at his hip, a knife in his hand and walks out, tossing a smile over her shoulder at me. The door closes with a bang. I scream as the man slides the knife across my skin._

I hear voices, but that doesn't make sense. I'm in a little house in the mountains somewhere near Rome. Why are Bex, Liz, Macey and Zach here? "Cammie, Cammie." Somebody slaps me and I cry out as my eyes snap open. I grab the wrist of the person who slapped me, flipping them over and locking my fingers around their throat, squeezing. I look at the face of my attacker and immediately remove my hands.

"Zach," I choke out and burst into tears.

He sits up and wraps his arms around me. "What is it Gallagher Girl?" he asks.

"I remembered." I lose consciousness then, breathing a sigh of relief as I do.

When I open my eyes, I'm in my mother's office on her leather couch. I sit up and see Zach staring at me.

"Your making a bad habit of this," I say remembering how he'd sat in the same place last term and how we'd laughed at the idea of him being a trained peeping tom.

"Yeah well, I'm not the only one." He moves to sit next to me. "What did you remember?"

I swallow and look at him. "Torture."

He's up in a flash, pacing the room, not speaking. "Zach." I say. "Zach."

My tone must have broken through whatever thoughts he was having because he turns towards me. "Who?" It's all he says.

"Zach," I say knowing that if he new for sure he'd lose it.

"Who Cammie? Who?"

"Catherine. Your mother, Catherine." His shoulders visibly slump. He walks back over to the couch and sits down looking defeated.

"How much did you remember?" He asks me.

I probe my brain, looking for memories. I see what happened after Catherine left the room. How she'd tortured me in the days before. In my mind I see guns and electrical wires. I see knifes and whips, chains, fists. I remember weeks of near starvation, Dr. Steve, my fathers grave. I still don't remember being captured, how I'd escaped or anything about what I'd done before being captured. I look at Zach. "Torture. Days and days of torture. All of the days of torture."


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N Hey everyone:) New chapter today. I'll try to put another up tommorow. Please review and follow. Ideas, opinions and anything else welcome. I got 74 views and 2 reviews yesterday. Thank you for taking the time to write them and to read my story.**

**Disclaimer: The Gallagher series and characters belong to Ally Carter.**

"Torture," says Aunt Abby flatly. We're all gathered in my mother's office. Macey and Liz are sitting on the couch, Zach and Bex are pacing. Mr Solomon is sitting in a chair beside Aunt Abby and mom is behind her desk. I'm standing in front of it.

"Yes, torture. Weeks of it all in the little stone house we found when we went to Rome." I say. "I knew about the list, that much I'm sure of. I remembered the names too. I don't remember anything else though, except torture."

Bex lets of a string of cuss words which earn her a very sharp "Bex." from the headmistress. She grins sheepishly. "Sorry Ms. Morgan, it's just that all Cam remembers is pain, nothing but pain and we still don't know what else she did in her summer."

"It doesn't matter what else she did Bex. What matters is that we have the list and can begin to round the heads of the circle up," says Mr. Solomon. "In fact, if I'm not mistaken that's what your parents are doing right now."

"Yeah, but they won't let me help. None of you will let us help. We graduate at the end of this term, we're almost full agents and you won't let us help."

"Bex," I cut in, "We can't help for a reason." That reason being that we won't be here by the end of the week. Preston needs saving and we are the spies for the job. Also, Macey won't let it go and he helped me, maybe kept me alive for all I know. We'd been planning his kidnapping/saving from people who will kill him for weeks. We'd spent hours debating strategies and defense tactics, the best exit and entry points, the covers we would use and what we would tell our teachers and parents when we got him to Gallagher, also how to avoid a trip to Langley for interrogation and/or arrest. Bex seemed to get the message.

"Guys, we're late for P&E," Liz says, "we need to go."

I look to my mother. "Go," she says. Liz gets up and Macey, Bex, Zach and I follow her out.

I fall down as Macey's kick connects with my knees. I grab her ankle as she goes to kick me again, flipping her onto her back aiming a punch at her jaw.

"Ow," she groans. "Cam, was that really necessary?"

"Teach you not to kick my knees," I mutter, ducking to avoid being hit in the head with an arrow that a seventh grader had shot. I hear a shouted "sorry" from the other end of the barn and grin, thinking about how Liz used to do the same thing. I laugh as Macey jumps to her feet and pounces on me.

"Teach you not to punch my jaw," she says, smiling. She rolls off me and helps me up off the mats. We continue practicing until the class ends and we head upstairs, Zach with us. We reach our room and go in. I stop dead when I see the state of my bed. The blankets are on the floor and my clothes are strewn everywhere.

"You put up quite a fight before we could wake you up," Zach says seeing my face.

"Yeah well, you would have too if you'd been dreaming what I was," I say. "Thanks so much for slapping me by the way."

He grins, "anytime Gallagher girl, anytime." He gives me a quick kiss and goes to sit on the chair by Liz's desk.

"Don't touch any of that Zach," she shouts as his hand inches towards a vial of some purplish liquid. "It will burn the skin off of your hand down to the bone if you do, it isn't done yet." His hand moves away like it is on fire. Macey, Bex and I burst out laughing at the look on his face.

When we've regained our composure, Macey goes to a flip chart and starts rattling off our plans for Preston's rescue. "We leave tomorrow at midnight," she says. "Cam, you have the route to the jet planned out, right?"

"Yep," I answer, "we'll leave through the tunnel I left through last year; they kept it open in case of last minute evacuations that might be needed in an emergency."

"Good," she says. "Liz, you have your tech stuff organized and ready to bring?"

"Yes, and I updated everybody's comm units so that it will be harder for you to lose your signal," she says smugly.

"Genius Liz," Macey grins, "Zach and Bex, you have disguises, covers and tactics figured out?"

"Got it," they both say at the same time.

" I've got the jet, food and accommodations sorted out," Macey smiles, "we're good to go."


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N Hey all:) So longest chapter yet. Sorry that nothing overly important happens but I promise you'll get some action next chapter. I'll try to post it tomorrow. In the meantime favorite, review and keep on reading. Lots of love.**

I wake up to Macey throwing a pillow at my face. "Wake up," she hisses, "it's time." Bex throws my clothes at me when I don't get out of bed immediately.

"I'm up," I groan. "I'm up." I roll out of bed and look around. Liz had put a row of four backpacks near the door. She was currently wrapping two of her laptops in bubble wrap. I laugh. "Liz, what are you doing?"

"Every time we sneak out and go on a mission, something bad happens to us. I figured that since this time we are sneaking out, getting on a private jet in the middle of the night, flying to Rome and kidnapping an ambassador's son, I would rather be safe then sorry." We all burst out laughing when we realize just how true that statement is. Then we stop really fast, realizing just how true that statement is.

I can hear Macey swallow. "We'll be fine," she says. "It will all go according to plan. It will be fine."

"Damn right it will be," Bex says with enough confidence to burn through a good portion of our doubts.

I look at the clothes Bex had tossed at me. Black cargos, a tight black t-shirt and black running shoes. Very Bexish. At least it isn't the black dress she made me wear the last time we snuck out to save a friend. She tells me that we'll change into out disguises on the plane and I sigh, knowing that I just completely jinxed myself. I grumble as I pull on my clothes and grab my backpack, sitting on my bed and waiting for everyone else to be ready. When Liz finishes bubble wrapping the last of her techy gadgets, she looks up. "Lets go."

We make it to the tunnel that I left out of last summer without any problems. Liz was thankfully refraining from being her usual clumsy self and we hadn't heard a single "oops-i-daisy" all night. As we enter the tunnel, I can't help but wonder about the wisdom of our latest mission. I haven't had much luck with Rome in the past and I have a feeling that this mission isn't going to go anything like we planned it. I seriously doubted that it would be as simple as Liz disabling the security system, Bex and Zach keeping the guards busy, and Macey and me grabbing Preston. I tell myself to shut up as we emerge from the passage and see Zach standing next to the plane that Macey had called in. I walk toward him smiling, but can't seem to push my doubt from my mind. I ignore them and kiss him quick and hard before climbing onto the plane.

The flight isn't that long and I am able to sleep for most of it. I don't dream at all. It's a relief. When I wake up it's to man shaking my shoulder. "Wake up," whispers a low voice. It sounds like my dad.

"Five more minutes daddy." Saying that sends a sharp pain through me, but I can't figure out why.

"Gallagher Girl. Wake up." The voice is more insistent now. Not dad. I remember now. He's dead. Dead. My eyes fly open. I let out a strangled moan and Zach's arms go around me. I bury my face in his shoulder, allowing myself a moment of weakness in a world that requires strength. My moment is up. I force myself to pull away. As I do, my hand brush a cold, hard metal lump at Zach's hip. A gun. I recoil from him.

"Why do you have that?" He doesn't answer. "Zach. Why. Do. You. Have. That?"

"I have a bad feeling about this mission," he says keeping his eyes on the ground. "If we're in a bad situation, I want to have an out."

"Why the gun though?"

"Do you remember what Abby taught us on your first Covert Operations lesson back from your summer?" I nod. Of course I do. I'd almost killed Dr. Steve after that lesson. To bad I hadn't. Zach continues, oblivious to the thoughts going through my head. "She taught us that if you need a gun it's because its to late for you to be safe. That they are for the offensive. A last line of defense against death. I can hit a target that can barley be seen by the naked eye. There are some targets I'd really like to hit. If we come across them in Rome, I want the chance to hit them."

I nod. There are some targets I'd like to hit myself. " Alright. I get it. Sorry." I give him a quick kiss and go to change into my disguise. Thankfully Bex had chosen only a pair of blue jeans, flats, a nice t-shirt and a black wig. When I've put it on, I don't look like myself but it will still be easy to be the chameleon .

I go out to our seats and participate in the last minute plan check conversation. Everybody is disguised. Macey in jeans, a peasant blouse and converse high-tops. The look is finished off with a long red wig. Liz has on a dress, leggings, a jean jacket, heels and a straight brown wig that covers up her long blond curls. Bex is in red skinny jeans, a black t-shirt and a black hoodie. She is in running shoes and has glasses. Zach is in a pair of jeans and a lose grey t-shirt. He is also wearing running shoes and is sporting a new nose. When we've finished checking the plan we all go back to sitting quietly, Liz watching what looks like Captain America on her lap-top. Ten minutes later the plane lands. 45 minutes later we are at our hotel in the heart of Rome.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N Hey. Sorry I didn't post yesterday, I ran out of time. Well, enjoy and as always please review.**

**Disclaimer: Ally Carter owns the Gallagher Girls, not me.**

Macey only got us one room. Two double beds and a cot. Zach takes the cot and Bex and I take one bed well Liz and Macey take another. I throw my backpack onto the bed then sit down myself. Liz suggests that we all go to bed since we have a lot to do tomorrow. Yeah. A lot. When you're a spy a lot can mean many different things, from that report you forgot to file at the CIA headquarters to the ambassador's son you have to kidnap from his fortress in Rome to the groceries you need to pick up on the way home. I'd get the groceries without complaining at this point. I grab my pajamas and toiletries bag from my backpack and head to the bathroom to change and brush my teeth. I change and reach for my tooth brush, turning toward the mirror. As I open the cap to my tooth paste, I collapse.

_I reach for the gun at my hip, gingerly taking it from it's holster. It feels foreign and dangerous in my hands. I lift it, aiming at a piece of paper I had pinned to a tree. I fire. The gun jumps in my hands and my arms swing back from the recoil. The bullet came nowhere close to hitting the target. I raise the gun again, keeping a tighter grip this time. I aim and fire. The bullet just grazed the corner of my target. I breath in sharply, in my hands this weapon could kill somebody. I think of Zach._

_ "How far are those targets?" I'd asked him upon seeing the Blackthorne shooting range._

_ "Far." He'd answered me. He'd been trained to take lives, me to save them. Right now it would have been better to be trained as a killer. No, not a killer, an assassin. I pull my thoughts away from Zach and focus on the gun in my hands and the target in front of me. By the end of the afternoon, my aim was near perfect. I don't want to think of what Zach would say if he could see me now._

_The scene changes. I'm running. I turn and fire blindly at my pursuers. I hear a thud as one hits the ground and I know I've hit somebody. I don't even feel anything anymore. It's just the harsh reality of my world that I have to kill. It's survival, not murder. But I know it's not true. No matter who these people are or what they want from me, they don't deserve to die the way I am forcing them to. I try to ignore these thoughts and focus on running. A man drops onto the road in front of me. I think he jumped from the roof. Bex would be jealous. I just shoot him through the heart. I jump over his body as it hits the ground, hearing another thud, another kill for me. Another point. I feel sick. Then I remember that I don't feel anything. I don't know how long I run but when I stop, I'm alone. No tails, no circle. No capture. Not yet. I know it's only a matter of time though. I sigh thinking of something I'd heard a long time ago, at my dad's funeral I think: Though I walk into the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil._

"Cammie." Somebody slaps me. I come out of my memories to see Zach kneeling beside my crumpled body.

"Ow. Stop slapping me."

He doesn't laugh, or smile, or smirk. "You remembered more." He doesn't say it a question.

I look past him and see my roommate's grim faces looking down at us. "Yeah."

"What?" asks Liz.

I swallow. "It doesn't matter." I thought they'd keeping asking until I gave in, but the look on my face must have been enough to convince them to let it be.

"Go to bed Cam," says Bex.

"I won't be able to sleep."

Zach gives me a knowing look. "I'll lie with you until you fall asleep," he says.

I nod. "Okay."


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N Hey everyone. So long chapter for you today. Enjoy. Please review.**

**Disclaimer: Ally Carter owns all.**

When I wake up in the morning Zach's arms are still around me. He must of fallen asleep. I lay still for a moment savouring the feeling of pure joy that is radiating through my body. Joy. I haven't felt that in a while. Eventually my moment is up and I roll over deciding that his grip is to tight to get myself out of it. I shove his shoulder trying to wake him up.

"Zach." I whisper. "Zach."

His eyes fly open and he jumps out of the bed sending me onto the floor. "What is it, what's wrong?"

I get up laughing. "Nothing, you just fell asleep on the bed last night and I needed to wake you up so that I could get out of your arms." A pillow flies at my head.

"Shut up," grumbles Bex. "I'm trying to sleep."

"You're up now," I answer, my voice bright as the sun itself, might as well get the day started." She gets out of bed and I go to wake Liz and Macey. After breakfast (because when your about to engage in a very high risk non-official covert-op, you always need a good breakfast) we all sit down and go over the plan again. I have it memorized down to Bex's sarcastic comments. I change my clothes then into a pair of yoga pants and a hoodie; it might be Rome but it's still winter, as I pointed out to Macey four times. I watched as Zach strapped on his holster, swallowing hard as I remembered last nights memories. Zach seeming to sense what I was thinking walks over to me and wraps his arms around my waist. He puts his forehead against mine.

"You're are not her," he murmurs. I get the feeling he knows what I remembered last night. "You are not her."

I nod. "Thanks Zach." I say softly. I mean it. He kisses me and goes back across the room and loads two guns. He sticks one in the holster and one under the waist band of his pants hiding the telltale bulge with his shirt.

"Let's go," he says. "We have an ambassador's son to kidnap." Macey coughs. "Sorry, save," Zach corrects himself.

We sit in the van that Liz got from somewhere. I remember once again that even though Liz is the smallest, she is probably the most dangerous of us all.

"We all got it?" Asks Macey for the sixth time.

"Yes Mace." We chorus. Zach, Macey, Bex and I get out of the van. Zach and I climb to the roof of the building adjacent to Preston's house, well mansion, and began surveillance, we watch as Macey and Bex walk around the block changing clothes every so often so they aren't as noticeable. Nothing eventful happens at Preston's house until about two hours after we started surveillance. We see an eight team group, dressed in black and carrying hand guns, slipping inside through an open window.

I look at Zach. "We need to go in now." I say.

He nods. "Duchess, Peacock and Bookworm," he says, "the circle is here. We need in now. There is an open window on the east side of the building. That is our entry point. We'll have to find an exit when we get to that point. Lets go." Everyone must here the urgency in his voice because nobody argues with our change of plans. We weren't planning to go in until late tonight, but if we don't go in now, Preston won't be alive.

"Zach," I say, "What about the ambassador? They'll kill him."

"Let them." He says.

I give him a look. "Alright, if we can we'll try to get him out of there." He communicates this to the others, then we climb off the roof.

About ten minutes later, we are in Preston's house. The window lead to a bathroom, I am slightly appalled by how easy it was to break into a high security US government home. We run through the house, looking for Preston.

I hear a gunshot. "Guys," I yell, "the dining room." We all head toward the room in which we had talked to Preston mere months ago. When we get there I see Preston and his father on their knees, hand behind their heads. Catherine stands in front of them, gun leveled. I don't see her seven companions.

"Mom?" I hear Zach say.

She turns. "Ah, Zach. Oh… Cammie as well. Macey and Bex? I don't believe I've had the pleasure, though I have met your parents Bex. May I say they look just like you. To bad that you will most likely never see them again. Don't worry my dear, they have been given adjoining cells in our headquarters." Bex lets off a string of swear words so rude Preston blushes. "Cammie dear, how naughty of you to ignore Dr. Steve's order. You've caused me quite a problem. Well, I'll deal with you just after I've finished off Mr. Winters here and his lovely son." She turns back to them and puts the gun to Ambassador Winter's head. She pulls the trigger and Preston lets out a strangled cry as his father slumps forward and hits the ground. We all stand frozen. She turns to Preston.

"No," Macey cries. She kicks the gun out of Catherine's hand and then flings her body on top of Preston's, creating a human shield. I see the gun spinning through the air and lunge for it but Catherine gets there first. She points it at my chest with a smile.

"Well, well Cammie, good try." She looks over my shoulder. "Well time for me to leave." Out of the corner of my eye I see the missing seven men she had shown up here with. "Take care, of this boys." She then walks out of the room. We are all frozen again. I see Macey help Preston up. He looks pretty shaken up but he is holding it together.

Macey looks at the men by the door. They all have guns pointed at us. "Boys," she says, "lets put those away."

They laugh. "Not a chance Miss," one says. "Wouldn't want to anger Catherine."

Macey smiles. "In that case, Bex." Bex kicks out, Zach mirrors her movement and two men fall down unconscious. One of the five remaining men fires his gun at Macey. Luckily he misses. He won't next time.

"Zach," I shout, "give me a gun."

He looks at me mid- punch. "What?" He asks as his fist connects with another mans face.

"We aren't going to all make it out of here alive if we leave them alive. If they go back to your mother without having killed us, she'll kill them. So gun now." He tosses one to me and I grab it out of the air. I flip of the safety and aim at one mans heart. I fire and he falls down dead. I fire off five more shots, each one finding there targets. When I'm done there are seven dead bodies on the ground. I feel numb. I feel like I did in the summer. Worst of all, I feel powerful. I ignore my friends gaping mouths and Preston's look of fear.

Zach is the first come to his senses. "Lets go. We need to get out of here." We all nod and move toward the front door, Preston in tow. Well we found our exit strategy, I think numbly. I think I might hate myself, I think just as numbly.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N So, new chapter today. Enjoy and as always, R&R.**

**Disclaimer: Ally Carter owns all.**

We make it back to the van without any complications. Zach's hand is in mine as we sit in silence the whole way back to the hotel. Preston is still looking at me as if I'm going to pull a gun a shoot him and Macey, Bex and Liz, who heard the whole thing over comms, are still gaping at me and seem unable to close their mouths. Zach just sits, my hand in his as if this is something he is used to, being from Blackthorne I guess he is. I am numb. I feel like I did in the summer. I feel like Summer Me. I'm not sure if I like it. I'd spent all of last term trying to be the old me, but now I wonder if I can be. Liz parks the van across the street from our hotel. We all go up to our room, Macey pulling Preston along. When we get there, Preston sits on a bed and Macey plops down beside him taking his hand. He leans into her. Bex throws herself down onto the other bed and Liz sits beside her. I stand awkwardly at the door with Zach still standing beside me. Still, nobody speaks, but they all stare. "I'm going to the washroom." I say.

When I exit the bathroom, I find Bex waiting at the door. I try to walk past her but she grabs my arm. "What the bloody hell was that?"

"Nothing." I say and yank my arm out of her grasp.

She follows me as I make my way to a chair. "Nothing? That's all you can say? You just shot and killed seven people using only seven bullets. That wasn't nothing."

"What was I supposed to do? Macey was protecting Preston, You and Zach were beating up Catherine's men and I was to far away to help. A gun went off, Zach had two guns of his own. I am the only person other than Zach who knows how to shoot and as Zach was indisposed I thought that it might be wise to dispose of our attackers because they all had guns and they weren't going to miss next time they shot ." I shout. "I am the only other person who knows how to shoot," I say more quietly.

"I thought you couldn't remember?" Bex says snappishly, seeming to be unable to find a flaw in my previously voiced logic.

"What did you think I remembered last night?" I shout. "Do you think I'm proud of the fact that I can shoot a gun with what I'm going to guess is better accuracy than Zach has? Do you think I like the fact that I don't feel bad that I just killed seven people? Bex, I didn't ask for this, but I spent my summer running from people who wanted to kill me. At some point, I had to learn to kill the very people who wanted to kill me, I had to learn to keep myself safe because the stuff we'd learned in P&E wasn't going to cut it. I ran away so that nobody would get hurt. I got hurt and I still don't know where I messed up but I know that I can shoot and I know that I just saved your lives. What I don't know is why your yelling at me about it."

"Well, excuse me if I'm being testy. I just watched my best friend kill a bunch of people and not five minutes before that I found out my parents had been captured by the circle and that they're probably dead." Bex burst into tears and I don't know what else to do so I put my arms around her and hold her well she sobs. Everybody else stares at us as we stand in the middle of the room, Bex's world falling apart, mine beginning to make sense again, however confusing that sense might be.

Finally Liz stands up. "Lets go home."

The plane ride home was uneventful. Bex sits alone, seeming to be in shock. Macey and Preston sit holding hands, Liz goes through CIA bulletins on her laptop, she'd already confirmed that Abe and Grace Baxter were MIA. I sit with my head on Zach's shoulder, his hand in mine, our knees touching. I fall asleep.

When we the plane lands at Gallagher, my mother and Mr. Solomon are waiting. I swallow hard as we get out of the plane, knowing that the words I'll be having with my mother will be worse then the rest of my day has been. When we get of the plane, the first thing my mother and Mr. Solomon notice is Preston.

"Preston Winters. I am sorry to hear about your father. I am Cammie's mother and the Headmistress of this school, you may call me Ms. Morgan," she motions to Mr. Solomon. "This is Joe Solomon, you may call him Mr. Solomon. Welcome to The Gallagher Academy for Exceptional Young Woman." My mother turns to Zach, "Mr. Goode, please escort Mr. Winters to your room and provide him with an empty bunk."

"Yes ma'am," he nods and then motions for Preston to follow him, disappearing into the school.

My mother turns towards Mr. Solomon, "Could you please go and give Preston a tour Joe?"

"Of course," he answers.

My mother turns towards Bex, Macey, Liz and I, "I am very disappointed in the four of you. Not only did you run away to Rome, you did it on your own, without back up and left seven bodies in your wake, eight including Mr. Winter's. It is all over the CIA and the news, I expected better. On the other hand you did take out seven circle members, though I am not at all pleased with the manner in which you did it."

"Sorry," we all mumble.

"As you should be. Bex we should talk."

"I already know about my parents," says Bex.

"Very well, and I'm sorry Bex." She then turns and walks back into the school.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N Hey guys, sorry I haven't updated in a while. I'm also sorry that this is purely a filler chapter. If you enjoy Zammie, you'll like this because that is really all this is. If you don't want to read Zammie stuff, sorry. I will get something better up soon, hopefully tomorrow. Again sorry. Also, if you have any ideas about where you want this story to go, please tell me. As always R&R. Love y'all.**

I make it to one of the many tunnels inside the walls of Gallagher before the tears fall. I don't think I've ever seen my mom so disappointed in my life. Great, you go to Rome, save somebody innocent and let eight people who aren't innocent die (even if you, and just you, killed seven of them) and your mother can barley look at you. That opp was run smoothly with barley a hitch. Well, okay, it had a lot of hitches but that doesn't mean it wasn't a good thing. I know in my heart though that she wasn't disappointed in the fact that we'd gone to Rome, but that she was scared because I'd killed seven people. I was too. So I sit and cry. Zach finds me eventually. Without a word he slides down the wall to sit next to me. He wraps his arms around me and pulls me against his body, burying his face in my hair.

"Your not a monster," he says. "The girls told me what your mom said. I know you think that you are, that you should be feeling something right know. If you do though, the feelings will run you into the ground. Summer you new that, now you know that too."

"Zach, I don't want to know, I don't want to be that person. I don't want to know what it's like to shoot somebody. God, Zach. If I had the option I would willingly give up my memory again just so that I wouldn't have to. Why can't we just be normal teenagers?"

"You want to be a normal teenager? Okay then, get us out of the school and I'll take you on a date."

I look at him, a smile spreading slowly across my face. "Are you serious?"

"Yeah."

"Let's go then."

(Page break)

We sit in the Roseville movie theater watching, believe it or not, a James Bond movie. Zach and I have made a game out of naming protocols and moves that Mr. Bond should have done and didn't and when somebody should be dead, but isn't. It's the most fun I've had in months. Somebody shushes us when we start laughing at a particularly badly performed roundhouse kick.

Zach turns around to see who it was and heaves a sigh, "Hey Jimmy!" He says with false cheer.

"Oh hey, Zach right?" Asks Josh. I sink lower in my seat.

"Yeah." Thankfully somebody else shushes them then. Unfortunately, the movie ends 15 minutes later and despite my best efforts at avoiding Josh and his date, who I'm guessing is Dee Dee, we run into them outside the theater.

"Hey guys," says Dee Dee.

"Hey, how are you?" I return, because even when faced with an ex and his girlfriend, Madame Dabney has done her job well.

"Oh, we're great. It's so good to see you and Zach together," she gushes, "you make a really cute couple."

"Oh, thanks," I say, throwing a look at Zach that clearly says save me. He just smirks, but my glare has him grabbing my hand and turning to Josh.

"Well Jimmy," he says, insisting on getting Josh's name wrong even though it has been years since we dated, "nice to see you but we've got to go."

"Oh, yeah, sure. "Josh answers, he must be confused my the abrupt end to our conversation. "Well, bye Cammie." He nods to Zach.

"Uh, yeah, bye." I all but run away from the two of them, pulling Zach along behind me. We run into an alley and Zach doubles over laughing. "It's not funny," I say.

"Of course not." He kisses me. "Come on," he says against my skin, "let's go home."


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N Hey everyone. Thank you so much for your supportive reviews, I really appreciate them. I can't believe I have gotten 21. As always enjoy and review. If you have any ideas for where you want the story to go, feel free to share them. Love you all:)**

When we get back to Gallagher, we do something else that I think would be considered normal, star gazing. Lying on our backs in the middle of the well manicured grounds, I can't think of anywhere else I'd rather be. I lie with my head on Zach's chest, his hand is draped over my stomach.

"I love you Gallagher Girl," it's the first time he's said it.

I turn my head and kiss him. First on the cheek, then the jaw, finally his lips. His tongue touches mine an I groan, pulling back. "I love you too." I kiss him again, then rest my head back on his chest. We lie like that for about an hour, until I fall asleep. The last thing I remember is Zach picking me up, bridal style.

(Page break)

When I wake up the next morning, I'm not in my bedroom. Nobody is in the room with me either. My senses go into over drive, my instincts fighting with each other, fight, flee, fight, flee, fight… somebody enters the room. My foot sweeps out of it's own accord, the person stumbles. I aim a kick at their shin, then their knee, the person falls and I drop beside them, my fingers locking around their throat. I look into their eyes, their green eyes.

"Zach," I breath. I let go of his neck and offer him my hand. "Sorry," I say sheepishly, "reflex."

He grins, "S'okay, great way to get the senses going."

I look around, now recognizing the room as his bedroom. "Uh, what am I doing here?"

"Thought it better not to wake up the girls. We were out pretty late and the last time I woke Rebecca up, she broke my hand."

I laugh, "In that case, good morning." I kiss him and he wraps his arms around me. After a while I disengage myself. "I have to go get dressed," I say regretfully.

He catches me at the door for one more kiss. "See you at breakfast."

I ignore the looks the girls give me when I enter our room.

"So," Macey lets the word hang between us, "where were you last night?"

"I fell asleep so Zach carried me back to his room. A better option then facing the wrath of Rebecca Baxter when she was woken from her beauty sleep."

Bex shrugs, "It's true," she says.

"I know," chimes Liz, not looking up from the test tubes on her desk. "Last time I did that, you ripped my favourite pajama's when you pinned me against the wall."

I laugh as I head towards my corner of the room to grab some clothes, I change into my school uniform, then duck into the bathroom to do my hair. I don't wear any makeup because it would just get messed up in P&E anyway. I give up on my hair after about five minutes and throw it into a pony tail. Whatever. I brush my teeth and splash cool water onto my face, then head back out to the room where the girls are waiting for me so that we can all go down to breakfast.

When we get there I see that waffles are on the menu. I also see that Zach has already grabbed me a plate and stacked waffles on it, with butter and syrup just the way I like it. I smile when I see that he even got me orange juice

I walk over to him and give him a small kiss, "Thanks."

"Welcome," he answers as I slip onto the bench beside him.

Bex is the next person to sit down and she drops her plate onto the table, making a loud bang. My vision turns black and I know what is about to happen.

_"Oh, Cammie. Here Cammie, here Cammie." Catherine. I hate her. I'm hiding behind a blue transport truck. Well, I think it was blue at one point, it looks like the driver had a nasty accident, and although his remains aren't here, the truck is and looks like it has been for several years. I have my gun in my hand, but it only has one bullet left. I have promised myself to save it for me. If they are going to take me, it won't be alive. I'm somewhere just outside of Rome. I have been trying to ditch the circle all day, but Catherine is very good at tailing people, even if they are pavement artists like me. I have a suspicion that before she took the job of evil assassin lady, she was very much like me. A pavement artist. I almost want to laugh at the thought. I hear a loud bang, the sound of a bullet hitting the truck. I can't run anymore. I new this day was coming for weeks now. You can only run for so long before you have to stop. In my case, it wouldn't matter if I could run anymore because I hear a bang and feel a bullet enter my leg. I go down onto one knee and without thinking, lift the gun in my hand, aim and fire. It enters Catherine's arm, but she doesn't waiver. I realize what I just did to late. They will have me alive now. I hope they'll kill me. I have to much blood on my hands to ever go back to my life the way it was, not that they'll ever let me. I picture Zach. Zach jumping off a train into the middle of nowhere. Zach his hands in my hair, pressing his mouth to mine. Zach. A hand coming from behind me presses a sickly sweet smelling cloth to my mouth. I'm to tired to fight. I let the chloroform wash over me, let it force me into a black oblivion. I welcome it._

I come out of the memory, my head slumped against Zach's shoulder. Liz is shaking me.

"I'm okay," I say, not wanting to share the memory with them. "How long was I out?"

"1.6 minutes," answers Liz automatically.

I smile at her exactness. "Okay then. I'm hungry," I say and dig into my waffles.

Zach and Bex frown. Bex says nothing though and pulls out a History of Interrogation. Zach leans closer to me and whispers, "I'll get it out of you later." I nod knowing there will be nothing I can do to stop him.

I remember about Preston. "Um… guys, has anybody seen Preston?" I hear a chorus of no's, only Macey stays quiet, her eyes glued to the table. "Mace?" I ask.

"They took him to Langley last night," she glares at the table, "they had some questions for him."


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N Hey, sorry it is so short. I'm pretty busy right now. Please review. Thanks for all of the nice things you said about the last chapter. Love y'all3**

**Disclaimer: Ally Carter owns all.**

"They what?" I say, outraged.

"They took him to Langley." Macey is still glaring at the table. "They said he might have information on the circle and took him last night."

"You know this how?" Asks Bex.

"I gave one of the men a black eye and broke the leg of the another," she shrugs. "They ticked me off."

Zach laughs, "they ticked you off and your gut reaction was to spin out some defensive moves?"

"Yeah, Preston looked like his eyes were going to fall out of his head. They finally pulled out their badges and told me that if I didn't let them take him, they would make sure I was pulled out of this school and that on top of that they would arrest me and take me with them. I figured I wouldn't be able to do anything to help if I was in a cell at Langley."

"So what are we going to do?" Liz asks.

"Nothing," says an irritated voice. I turn to look behind me. Mom. "Cammie, Zach, my office please."

As we walk towards her office, she doesn't say a thing. Zach grabs my hand as if sensing that I was on the verge of losing it. I smile at him. He smiles back. My mother opens her office door and steps aside, motioning for us to enter,_ Catherine pushes me into a dark, damp musty smelling room. "Welcome home Cammie," she says, removing my blindfold._ I pull myself into the present.

"Gallagher Girl? You okay?" Asks Zach.

I swallow. "Fine." We walk into my mother's office. Welcome home, I think sourly as I see the couch I'd spent almost every Sunday since seventh grade on.

My mother motions for us to sit on it and takes the chair at her desk. She doesn't waste any time, just gets to the point. "Under the circumstances, it has been decided that we need to test your shooting ability Cam. Zach, you will assist her. Targets have been set up in the woods already, Abby and Joe are waiting. They have guns with them so there will be no need to take your own. I'd hurry if I were you, they're calling for rain." We get up and head to the door. I can't believe my mother is being so rude. As I put my hand on the door, she says one more thing. "Kiddo, I know that you think I'm being mean and I'm sorry, but I've got a lot going on right know. Between the Baxter's going missing and you running of to Rome to save Preston, my hands are full."

I nod, "see you later Mom."

When we get to the targets that have been set up in the woods, my breath catches, as does Zach's. It looks like the whole Gallagher gun collection is on the ground in front of one of the targets. I swallow hard and Zach's arm goes around my waist. "It'll be fine." He says.

"I know," I say with confidence that I don't feel. He presses his lips to my forehead, then my mouth.

"Ahem." Somebody clears their throat. Abby. Zach and I jump apart. "I see you found us than. Zach, I would appreciate it if you'd refrain from sticking your tongue into my niece's mouth."

Zach and I both turn red, Mr. Solomon laughs. "Yes ma'am," I thought Zach would salute.

"Okay, with that cleared up, lets get started, Joe, if you'd be so kind as to explain?"

"Okay," says Mr. Solomon. " We set up targets at 50 paces, 100 paces, 200 paces, 300 paces, and 350 paces. There are some beyond that but I would be astounded if you were to hit them. The farthest is at 600 paces. You will shoot using which ever gun you feel like using, and Zach will shoot at the same time as you. The purpose of this is to see how good your accuracy is compared to somebody who has been shooting since they first started training in seventh grade. You may each take a couple practice shots to begin with. Go."

Zach and I both grab handguns. I aim for the target, just visible at 300 paces. Aunt Abby goes to check it. I hit it dead center Zach aimed for the same one and got the same result as me. I aim for what looks like 400 paces, dead center again. Zach got the same result. I hear Mr. Solomon suck in a breath. I aim for 600 paces. I hit it dead center for a third time. Dead centro Zach missed completely. Mr. Solomon shouts for Aunt Abby to move the target back to 700, dead center, 800, dead center 900, dead center We stop then. It has been a little over an hour and I officially have better aim than a Blackthorne boy. I swallow the lump of dread forming in my throat.


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N Hey everybody. So very short chapter for you today, but very important as well. Enjoy, and as always please review. If you have any questions about the story, I usually answer them. If you have any ideas, opinions or just thoughts on the story, please feel free to send them:) **

**Disclaimer: Ally Carter owns all so please refrain from suing me.**

It's Saturday. Zach and I go down to the P&E barn to train. Bex, Macey and Liz head to the library to finish up on an essay for Aunt Abby. As far as the rest of the school know, Mr. Solomon is still dead. As I duck a punch from Zach, I think of how ironic it is that in a school full of highly trained spies in training, nobody notices the dead man roaming the halls. I smile. Then I kick Zach in the stomach. Hey, boyfriend or not, this is training not flower picking. He grunts and kicks me in the shin. I fall to one knee and he comes in to finish me off, aiming a kick at my stomach. My hands come up, trapping his foot against my body. I go into a back roll, using my momentum to pull him with me. I land on top of him, his leg bent up between our bodies, my forearm on his neck, my other hand pushing against the side of his head. If I put any more pressure on his head, his neck will snap. He stares at me his eyes wide. I realize that everybody else in the barn is staring at me as well. I get off of Zach and offer him my hand. He takes it and I pull him up.

He rubs his leg and looks at me. "Where did you learn to do that?"

"A woman I met in Paris, a nun actually. Her father had been CIA before he died on a mission to Paris, so she left America, moved to Paris and has been looking for his killer ever since." I say it without thinking, without wondering where the answer came from.

Zach looks at me, "Paris, as in France? You were in France?" he asks sharply.

I look at him, my eyes wide. "What was I doing in France?"

He starts to say something but is interrupted by Macey and Liz who come into the barn, running full tilt. They skid to a stop in front of us. "Bex is gone. She thinks her parents are being held by Catherine's branch of the Circle in France," say's Macey. "Oh, and she took my plane. Called my pilot and asked him to pick her up. I think I'm going to have to get a new pilot."

My mind is whirling. "Wait, you just said France. Where in France?"

"Paris," Liz answers.

Zach looks at me and at the same time we both say, "Paris."


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N So, hi again. Sorry I haven't posted in like a week, life got busy. Lets all take a moment to thank life for being so very complicated. with that said, please enjoy and don't forget to review. Love you all.**

Paris. It is really as beautiful as everybody says. The city of love. Yeah, love. Most definitely not what was on my mind well sitting on the roof of the building adjacent to the hotel we think Bex is staying in. In Paris. Where we had just gotten to by a jet stolen from the air-port near Roseville. Who new, Zach could fly a plane? Anyway so we flew to Paris without telling anyone, and now we were sitting on a roof with hand guns on our belts (well Zach and mine) and binoculars in our hands. Running surveillance. On a roof. In Paris. Did I mention that? Why can't my life be normal?

We all know that it is only a matter of time, hours probably before the CIA, MI6 and the majority of the Gallagher Academy for Exceptional Young Women staff come looking for us, but hey, we still have what Liz estimates to be 12.26 hours before they start to look. In the meantime I try not to think about what happened last time I was here. Lets just say, angry Nuns, a crepe guy who didn't like my attitude and the discovery of a circle base run by Catherine (which I apparently managed to get a few grenades into before I had to run), didn't exactly make for a relaxing vacation. I sigh. I say it once again, why can't I just be normal?

After about two hours, Macey speaks. "Guys, we haven't seen her yet, but we have her on the security cameras entering the building and we only left home about an hour after her, so it's not like we had a chance to miss her coming out of the building. If I know Bex, she'll be sleeping, in the morning she'll go over her plans one more time, then she'll make her move. She's not stupid, she'll know we followed her here, she'll know we'll have tabs on her. My suggestion is that we go sign into the hotel I booked on the plane ride here, nice flying by the way Zach, and hit the sack."

"Okay," says Liz, "I need to charge my laptop anyway." That settles it. To bed we go.

Once we get signed into our hotel room, Zach and I get into one bed and Liz and Macey get into the other. Zach's arms go around me pulling me closer to his chest and I tuck my head under his. It feels good. I hope I don't dream tonight.

_A man stalks toward me, a lustful glint in his eyes. I realize my shirt is missing. He comes up to me, running his hands over my stomach, his hands inching there way up towards my cleavage. I jerk away. He leans close to my face, "well, I think I'll have fun with you." He kisses me._

I wake up screaming. Somebody puts their arms around me and kisses my neck. I throw them off the bed and jump on them as the hit the floor. I want to kill them. How dare they touch me like that, how dare they do what they did. "Get your hands off of me you bastard, " I scream. "Don't ever touch me again." I kick the person in the groin, then the stomach. I punch their jaw, then kick there ribs. I hear a crack, then two sets of hands grab my waist, pulling me off.

"Cammie," it is Liz's voice. "Cam, that's just Zach. Your boyfriend, Zach." She sounds like she did when she was trying to keep me from killing Doctor. Steve. The thought makes me struggle more.

"Zach," it is Macey this time. "I know your hurt but go fill something with cold water and dump it on Cam before somebody sends a noise complaint." The next thing I know, water is dumped on my face. I jerk out of my stupor.

"Oh, my God. Zach are you okay?" I ask. He is holding his side.

"Fine." He answers. "I have a better question. Are you okay?"

I plaster on a fake smile, flashing him a look that clearly says to let it go, that I'm dealing. "Never better." I go to get the first aid kit so that I can bandage Zach's ribs. I don't want to remember anymore.


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N Hey, sorry it has taken me so long to update. I've been sick. Not important so on with the show, well story. So in case you've forgotten, we left off last chapter with the gang in Paris looking for Bex, Cammie remembering that she'd been raped as part of her torture and Zach trying to comfort her then almost being killed by her because she thought he was her rapist because she wasn't thinking straight. I promise Zach didn't rape her. Long chapter for you today, I hope you like it. Please review and tell me what you think, even if you think this sucks and I should quit writing because I'm fouling it for the rest of the world. Also I'd like to give a nice big shout out, thank you, hug and/or warm fuzzy to gallaghergirl112 for a very supportive review that made me smile. Thank you to everybody else that has reviewed, followed, favorited or read. Now then read and enjoy, or don't enjoy. Your choice.**

**Disclaimer: This will be my last disclaimer because I hate doing them and if you haven't figured out that I'm not Ally Carter yet, you should go talk to somebody. So for the last time, I am not Ally Carter. The Gallagher Girls series, characters and previous plot lines belong to her. **

Zach stands in the bathroom in front of the mirror while I wrap bandages around the skin surrounding his rib cage. My face is blank, any signs of emotion wiped clean of it, but I knew Zach would figure out what I had remembered eventually. I would have if it had been him.

"They raped you, didn't they?" He asks me. No beating around they bush, just direct. To the point. Zach.

I look down. "Yeah. It doesn't matter know though. It happened, there is nothing I can do to change it, so I'm going to try to let it go."

He jerks out of my grip, spinning around and pinning me to the wall. "Don't let it go. Don't say it doesn't matter. Cammie. You. Were. Raped."

"I know that Zach, but we have bigger issues. Bex is on her own and has a grudge against the Circle. They have her parents. She will try to kill anybody who keeps her from them and I'm not going to let my best friend know what cold blooded murder feels like." It just slips out. I didn't mean for it to, but know hat I've said it, I realize that it's the truth. The cold hard truth. I have killed, murdered, innocent people. I don't want Bex to know what that feels like and if we don't stop her, she will.

Zach face softens immediately and he kisses me. "You are not a murderer," he says when he pulls back. I just kiss him again, needing to forget. He sets me on the sink counter. "I love you Cammie. I love you more than you will ever know."

"I love you to," I answer. I go to kiss him again but stop when somebody pounds on the door.

"Guys," shouts Liz, a very un-Liz like thing to do. "We have eyes on Bex."

* * *

We both run out of the bathroom, tripping over each other to get out first. Over the summer, Bex and Zach grew pretty close. They both spent about a month searching for me in Budapest, and since they both love me they were each other's shoulder to lean on. Liz didn't actually have eyes on Bex, more like numerous cameras it seems she sneaked out to plant late last night. On her on.

"You did what?" Macey says in exasperation.

" While you all slept, I went out and planted cameras around Bex's hotel and for three blocks in every direction going away from it." Liz answers as if this were completely normal and should have been expected.

"You went out on your own, in the middle of the night, in a city that we know for a fact is home to a circle base? Are you crazy Lizzie?" I ask her.

"No, I'm not crazy. In fact I'm quite sane. I'd also like to point out that if we don't go now, we'll lose Bex."

"Let's go then," says Zach before anybody can start arguing again.

* * *

We track Bex until we see her. I jump out of the black BMW Liz stole from some poor person. She'd left a note in it's place, apologizing.

"Bex," Her head turns towards me and she smiles as Catherine steps around a corner. "Bex!" I scream.

I see her notice Catherine, see her eyes widen. I start to run. "Hey Cam," shouts Catherine. "Long time no see. I hope the fallout from our last encounter wasn't to bad." She laughs, "who am I kidding? You went behind the back's of the CIA and your parents, then you killed seven people and let a Circle member holding valuable information die. On top of that the whole thing was all over the press. The fallout must have been horrible."

I've reached her now and I push Bex behind me while kicking out at Catherine. I catch her ankles and she falls down, at the last second grabbing my waist and pulling me down with her. We roll and I come out on top but am pulled off by one of her men. Zach, Macey and Liz are here now fighting alongside Bex and I. More of Catherine's people spill onto the street. I hear Zach call my name and see Macey perform a very good roundhouse kick, something that she had worked very hard at because she never could quite get the hang of it. All I can feel is the hand around my throat.

"Put me down Charlie," I spit. Charlie. The name comes from somewhere inside my memory and I know that it is right. Charlie had been one of my torturers, well more of a jailer. He'd been nice enough for somebody who was keeping me locked up against my will and standing by everyday while I was tortured to the breaking point. He'd brought me food, and after a pretty bad beating had once cleaned out the wounds on my back. He used to bring me the latest gossip , usually what people in the circle were saying about me, and even told me about his wife and how they were expecting, she had been almost three months along when I'd escaped. "Please," I say with less venom, "put me down, I won't run, I have people here I love." He looks at Catherine and she nods. My feet touch the ground and my neck is released. I rub it and look behind me. We are outnumbered making it about 1 to every 8 person. I know we can't win against those odds. We can't escape either. I turn around. "Stand down," I shout, "Stand down." They don't so I turn on my comms unit. "We are outnumbered and will not be able to win. If any of you want to live for another five minutes, you need to stand down. They have snipers on the roof tops and Catherine wouldn't be here unless she was sure she could take the five of us. Somebody grab Bex, she isn't on comms, and come over here. We don't have any other options."

Macey says something very rude in response, Liz scolds her, then me and Zach yells at me well beating up a man twice his size and fending off 6 other people. Eventually they agree though and grab Bex who just starts swearing.

"Shut up," Zach shakes her roughly, "you were the one that ran off to Paris on your own, without backup and without a sufficient plan."

I shoot them both a look but it is Catherine who interrupts them, "I agree with my son," she says, " shut up." They both blink at her, astonished. "Very good. Cammie, could you please introduce us?"

"Sure Catherine," I say, hate dripping from my voice. "Bex, Macey, Liz and Zach, meet Catherine and Charlie. Catherine and Charlie, meet Bex, Macey , Liz and Zach." This is ridiculous I think, we are surrounded and in Catherine's grasp and I'm doing introductions? Oh well, might as well be polite, maybe they'll kill us quickly. "Charlie, did your wife have the baby?" I ask him. Bex, Macey, Liz and Zach gape at me, mouths wide.

"You remembered." Charlie smiles. "Yeah, she did. A baby boy, we named him Ian."

"Congratulations, you deserve it." I'm genuinely happy for him. Maybe I'm crazy. I laugh, can you have a relapse of crazy? More likely I'm in shock.

Catherine clears her throat before Charlie can respond. Everybody else is still staring at me like I have three heads. "If you two are done catching up, Cammie, you know the drill."

I nod and turn to my friends. " Empty out your pockets, remove all jewelry and put it with any weapons in a pile at Catherine's feet." They did as I'd said. Nobody had any weapons. It turns out that Bex had been going for gelato and to come up with a plan (she'd left without one as Zach had guessed) and the rest of us had just planned on picking up Bex and flying her back home to Virginia. No such luck. Once we have done that, we are loaded into a car and taken to Catherine's base. None of us speak the whole way there. I wonder how this day went so wrong.


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N Hey everybody. Thanks for the reviews. Please continue to review with any comments or suggestions. If you find this chapter to descriptive or gruesome (I use that word loosely)please tell me. Until next time, enjoy.**

Day: 1

Somebody had tied a blindfold onto my face just as we had arrived at the base. Pointless because I already knew where it was. The car ride had been silent and the windows of the van they'd stuck us in were so tinted you couldn't even see outside. I try not to think about the last time a circle member had blindfolded me. It had been on the way to the little stone house where they'd tortured me, then taken my slowly returning memory from me. I have a sudden moment of panic, what if they take my memory again? What if they do that to somebody else? I can't believe I'd told my friends to stand down. The more reasonable side of my brain says that if I hadn't we'd all either be dead, or injured and captured instead of healthy, alive and captured. The only drawback is the captured part. And the guy who's pushing me ahead of him with his hands on my butt. I don't think I like that. I spin still blindfolded and kick him in the crotch. "Get your hands off my ass." I hear Zach choke on a laugh and Macey give a very undignified snort. The guy I'd kicked groans. I sense him raising a hand to slap me. "I wouldn't do that if I where you." I can just imagine his face. Bex laughs out loud and even Liz giggles. I smile. Even blindfolded, captured and with a very good chance of being tortured again, it's nice to hear everybody laughing. The guy tells us to shut up then motions for his guard friends to take us inside. I hope they're taking us to our cells, I could use a nap.

* * *

Turns out they were taking us to our cells. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately, I'm not sure yet,) the circle only gave us one cell. One cell for the five of us. At least it is decently sized, has a toilet and one bed. It even has a sink, albeit ugly sink, bed and toilet, no walls which means no privacy and only one single bed and five of us. It's still better than my summer living arrangements. For now. Sort of. My cellmates are kind of angry at me.

"What the bloody hell was that?" Asks Bex, her accent strong like it always is when she gets angry.

"That was me saving your lives."

"By getting us captured?" She yells.

"Yes Bex. By getting us captured. If you had told us you were going to run off to Paris, I could have confirmed there was a circle base here. I know because I threw a couple of grenades into here over the summer. This is Catherine's favourite base. It's the first one she took over once her splinter group was strong enough and it is the best protected. You can't get anybody out unless it's an inside job, and that kind of job would require months of carful planning and more backup than the CIA would be able to provide. The men that attacked us were armed. We weren't. We were just going to grab you and fly you back home. We weren't prepared for an ambush, weren't prepared for Catherine. My choice was to let you all die, or keep you alive. I chose to keep you alive." My voice sounds tired. "If you parents are here, we'll find out. We can try to keep them alive and we can try to keep ourselves alive. If we get the chance, we can try to get out, but I doubt we'll get he chance."

"How can we keep Mr. and Mrs. Baxter alive?" Ask Liz and Zach at the same time. Everybody turns to me waiting for my answer. It takes a long time to come out.

"We bargain and we deal with the consequences."

* * *

Nobody liked my answer, but everybody knew I was right. I don't think anybody really realized what I meant when I said bargain. I really meant distract and bargain as a last resort. Distract as in let them torture me. I don't know what I have (or can say I have) that Catherine will want, but I'm sure I'll think of something, after all, I was the one who ordered the stand down. I'm still unsure as to whether that was the right thing to do or not. Doesn't matter, I did it. I need to stop thinking so I get up and walk over to Zach. I sit down beside him, let him pull me against his side, his arm is around my waist, my head on his shoulder.

He kisses my hair. "It'll be okay."

"No. It won't. The first thing they are going to do is take me to an interrogation room and torture me. I'm going to tell them what they want, lead them into thinking I know something I don't so they'll leave the rest of you alone. It'll buy us time and it the Baxter's are here, it'll buy them time too. In the end, it isn't going to make a difference. I won't let them touch any of you. They won't do to you what they did to me. It isn't going to be okay."

He pulls back. "You can't. Cammie, you can't."

I give him a sad smile, a defeated smile. "I can. I have to." I kiss him before he can reply. "I have to," I whisper against his lips. I feel his arms tighten around me. We sit like that for a little over an hour. His arms around me, my head against his shoulder, our legs pressed together. Macey, Liz and Bex sit in a line on the floor beside us. Nobody talks. We sit defeated. Hopeless. Charlie comes to get me and I know it is starting again. Same as the summer. Zach yells as I get up and start to walk towards the barred door of our cell. He tries to follow but I kick him in the stomach. "No Zach. Not today, not ever. I won't let them touch you. I won't let them touch any of you," the look he gives me is hurt and scared. Zachary Goode is scared. The door slams shut between us, cutting me off from my boyfriend and my best friends. I wipe a tear from my eye. "I love you," I whisper.

Charlie looks at me, sympathetic, sorry. "Lets go Cam." I give him a weak smile, touch the door and follow him down a dark. Narrow hallway with cell doors lining it.

* * *

"Hey Cam, I hope you like your new living arrangements." The voice is dripping with malice and fake cheer. The hate in it makes me want to turn and run in the opposite direction.

"Yes," I say pleasantly, vowing that she won't get a reaction out of me. "We found them quite to my liking. Thank you so much for supplying us with a bed Catherine, it was much appreciated." Madame Dabney did her job well.

Catherine sighs, "So then anything we should know about? Plans to take down the circle? Your memory turning up anything worth getting out of it?"

I smile pleasantly, "of course not Catherine, why on earth would I know anything like that."

"I don't believe you." She turns to Charlie who is hovering by the door to this white room. I look at the floor and see that it is tiled and has a drain. A drain. I wonder how much of my blood will be washed down it once they decide they are done with me for the day. I wonder how many days will follow. I wonder what I can try to convince them I know. I wonder if it matters if they think I know anything anyway. Maybe they'll just enjoy torturing me. I hear Catherine talking and it brings my thoughts back to the room, to today. "Charlie, would you be so kind as to invite will into the room? Tell him to have fun." She leaves then and after throwing me an apologetic smile over his shoulder, Charlie follows. I sit down on the table attached to the floor in the middle of the room. I swing my legs bored out of my mind until a guy, Will I take it comes into the room. With shock I recognize him as the one who raped me.

"Hey," he smiles at my face. "No sex today honey, just good old torture."

I laugh, a mean laugh. One that promises pain. "How disappointing." My voice is dripping with sarcasm. He doesn't seem to like that. He punches me in the jaw, then the ears. I swing and catch his nose, it almost breaks. Damn it. Why couldn't the stupid thing break?

"Forgot you like to fight back." he grabs some rope out of his pocket, forces me down onto the table and ties me down. Then he pulls a knife out of his pocket. "Feel like talking sweetheart?" I spit in his face. "Didn't think so." He drags the knife down my arm. Then my leg. Then he pulls my shirt up, something I avoid doing because of the scars on my stomach. He digs the knife point into the skin on my stomach and twirls it.

I just smile at him, ignoring the pain. "How's this going for you? Want a coffee break yet? I've got nowhere to be." It's what I used to say when they would torture me over the summer. I know that Catherine will be watching this, probably through some window I don't see. I also know that she hates that line. Charlie told me that it became a line her people would use when they were fed up with something, that they would turn to whoever was with them and be like 'How's this going for you? Want a coffee break yet? I've got nowhere to be.' I guess even though they hated me they respected me in some weird twisted way. Respected my silence and unwavering loyalty to the organization I was training to be a part of. Catherine hated that. I can see in Will's eyes that he knows this because he looks scared. He hits my head so hard that I see black at the edges of my vision. I laugh "Good job, wouldn't want me to tick off Catherine. Can't have that now can we?" I shout the last part, wanting Catherine to hear, wanting her angry. She is. She storms in with a fire poker, the edge glowing red and white. She presses it to my stomach, her smile maniac. I only smile though. I got a reaction out of her. I made her angry. No matter what happens next, we both know I've won this round. I ignore the pain the hot metal pressed to my skin is causing me and bite my tongue to keep from shouting. Once the metal has cooled against me and the shape is branded into my skin, Catherine lifts the poker. She isn't done though. Her eyes tell me that much. She slams it into my wrist. It breaks and training or not I cringe at the audible snap. She brings down the poker again and again, I know I'll have bruises, broken bones, maybe a fractured rib or two. I know I'm bleeding but I fight to stay conscious. Eventually I can't though and I fall into a deep, dark oblivion.


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N Hi again. Well aren't you the luckiest readers ever? Of course you are, you get two chapters posted on the same day. I felt like I couldn't just leave things the way I had and although this isn't a great chapter, I think you'll like it. So how do you guys feel about Charlie? Please review and as usual, enjoy:)**

Day 2:

When I regain consciousness my internal clock alerts me to the fact that it is morning. Our second day as prisoners. I try to sit up and realize I'm still tied to the table. Crap. I turn my head and wish I hadn't. The thing most people forget about torture is that it usually leaves you with a pounding headache and a concussion. Luckily I'm pretty sure it's just a headache. Either way I'll get Charlie to check for me when he comes by to take me back to my cell. About 15 minutes after this thought, the door opens and Charlie comes in. He unties me and helps me sit up. Before I even have to ask, he motions for me to be still and checks for a concussion.

"Your good," he says after a moment.

I cradle my broken wrist against my chest. "Thanks Charlie," I say. "Can you help me off this table?"

"Sure," he answers and slides his arm under my shoulders. It's an odd relationship the two of us have. Prisoner and guard.

I give him a watery smile and try not to wince as my left leg hits the ground. "Okay, lets go." He helps me hobble back to the cell and by the time we get there, the majority of my wounds have opened up again and are bleeding all over both of us. I'm spent.

"Here," he says, leaning me against the wall so he can unlock the door. I start to collapse and he grabs my arm, making me shriek in pain. "God Cammie, I'm so sorry." About what I wonder, trying not to pass out again, the fact that you let them torture me again or the fact that you just grabbed my arm where it had knife cuts lining it? Both probably. He pushes open the door.

* * *

Everybody is awake and looks like they've had a sleepless night. They look up when they hear the door open. I watch their eyes widen in shock when they see me propped up against Charlie, him supporting my weight like he had all summer when he'd helped me to my bed then cleaned and bandaged my wounds when I couldn't. I know I must look like hell. I know my hair is matted with blood, I'm cut and scraped. At some point my shirt had been lost so everybody can see my white (well it's red now) sports bra and the new burn below it from where Catherine put the poker. Liz bursts into tears and Bex and Macey both sit with their hands over their mouths. Zach just sits still, his eyes angry and shocked. I don't think he'd be able to move if he tried.

I turn my head to look at Charlie. "Can you help me over to the bed?" He nods in response. Once there he helps me lie down. "Thanks Charlie. I guess from here, the drill hasn't changed." He nods again and with a glance at my friends and Zach leaves the room to go and get bandages, a bucket of hot water and a cloth, a towel and rubbing alcohol to clean any open wounds with. My friends eventually get a grip on themselves and come over to me to talk.

"What happened?" Asks Macey.

"Same as the summer. They asked questions I didn't answer. They didn't like that."

"I'll kill them." Says Zach. "I'll kill them."

"Zach stop it. I knew what I was doing when I told you guys to stand down. I knew this would happen and if it doesn't happen to me, it will happen to one of you guys. I won't let it."

Bex touches my stomach. "What happened?"

"I ticked off Catherine so she decided to put a hot poker against my stomach." Zach's eyes flash.

Liz touches my wrist, "and this?"

"Catherine. Once the poker cooled, she got a little carried away."

"I'll kill her. I should have killed my Mother when I got the chance. I wish I had. God. I want her dead Cammie. I want to kill my Mother." He yells the whole thing.

"Zach stop it. You do anything stupid it will be you that looks like this." I yell back. He punches a wall.

* * *

By the time Charlie gets back, Zach is being restrained by both Macey and Bex. Charlie takes in the situation shrugs and comes over to me, supplies in hand. Liz comes over to help him but he waves her off. We kind of got this down in the summer. He starts with a hot cloth and is relentless in cleaning out my wounds. Zach seeing this calms himself down enough to come over to my side to offer moral support. The girls sit back down on the floor. Zach takes my hand and squeezes. Nobody talks as Charlie finishes washing out my wounds and begins to apply the rubbing alcohol. I bite my tongue to keep from yelling out. He finishes and starts wrapping my wounds. On top of the cuts, bruises and broken wrist, my left ankle is fractured. Charlie got pretty good at the whole first aid thing over the summer so he sets both my ankle and wrist, brushes his fingers over my forehead and leaves. Zach kisses me then crosses the room to sit with Bex, Macey and Liz, leaving me to sleep.


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N Hey, sorry it has taken me so long to update. Please enjoy and review. Also do you guy's like Charlie? If you do I can make him a bigger part of the story. Please review to tell me.**

Day 3:

When I wake up, I don't know where I am. My breath quickens and I begin to sweat. I'm paralyzed. I hear a voice. Zach's voice. I'm safe with him. Zach won't let anything happen to me. He hugs me and his touch makes me calm down. I can move again, I can talk. I still can't remember where I am. I turn my head to the side and take in the cell walls. I sigh as I remember where I am. Catherine, the Circle, capture and torture. Great couple days. I pull Zach to me and kiss him hard. I need to forget, to stop feeling. Zach is the only way I know how. We continue to kiss until Macey clears her throat.

"Hello? How are you two? Yeah, focus. We are in a Circle cell and Cam just turned up after being gone for a day and a night well being tortured by Zach's mother." Zach flinches. "So why don't the two of you stop making out and start acting like we are in the situation we are."

I sit up, "Mace, calm down. Freaking out isn't going to help anything."

"Really?" She replies. "Because I haven't eaten in three days now and the guy I love is in CIA custody."

Preston. I swallow guiltily. I'd completely forgotten about him. "I know Macey. I get it. I spent my summer worrying about all of you. I get it. You know that for two weeks Catherine had me convinced she had Zach as well as me? She had me convinced that she was torturing Zach." I'm kneeling next to her now. "Freaking out doesn't help. Freaking out just makes it worse. Don't let it be worse than it has to be. Don't let them win."

She nods. "Okay. You're right. Calm. I'm calm, I'll stay calm."

"Good. Calm. That's all you need calm."

* * *

Just as I finish that sentence, Charlie opens the door to our cell. His shoulders visibly relax when he sees that I'm okay. He wears the same expression of relief he did every morning all summer when he would see that I was still hanging on. He comes over and gives me a hug as if I was his daughter. "Thank god you're fine," he whispers into my hair.

I smile and pull back. "You want a coffee break Charlie? 'Cause I'm fine and since I've got nowhere to be, we could go together."

He snorts, "don't let Catherine hear you say that. It was you taunting her that made yesterday's as bad as it was."

I stop smiling. "Nobody raped me and I still have all of my limbs so I'd say it was okay."

Zach hits the wall again at my mention of rape. I hear the bones in his hand shatter. Charlie gives him a look then glances at me. "Your boyfriend has got some bad habit's. Don't understand why he thinks he can punch a wall without hurting himself. Wait a second and I'll some back and set it." He disappears into the hall for a moment then walks back in.

"That was fast," notes Zach eyeing the first aid kit in Charlie's hand with a wary expression.

"I keep a first aid kit outside the door to Cam's cell as a precaution. It's a habit I picked up over the summer, drives the wife nuts because I started leaving them lying around at home so that I could practice my EMT skills."

I laugh as he starts on Zach's hand. "I'd forgotten about that nickname. Charlie the EMT."

Charlie glares at the floor. "From what I've heard, Catherine and Steve made sure you forgot a lot of things."

"That's an understatement," say Bex, Macey, Liz and Zach simultaneously.

Charlie laughs, "I can see why you wanted to get back to these people. They're entertaining."

"That's one word for it."

He finishes with Zach's hand and looks up. "I'll bring by some food in about an hour. Sorry you haven't gotten any up until this point, Catherine isn't fond of making her prisoners feel at home or well fed."

* * *

The food sucks. Apparently the Circle doesn't have a very big budget for grocery's because our first meal in three days consisted of bread with mold on it, some cheese and water. Ew. Even in all it's grossness, the food was better then what I'd been eating in the summer. Well, except for the time when I hadn't eaten in nine days and Charlie went into some town nearby and bought me a Happy Meal. Catherine found out and got really mad and whipped me until I passed out. Charlie never brought me food again. I think about this well Macey tells us all how she would have preferred being at some high society event and eating lobster (both of which she hates) then be here, eating this. I smile at her face as she imitates her father telling a friend of his some story involving Macey's mom blowing one thousand dollars. When she makes her face into the shocked expression of the other man, we all burst out laughing. Our laughter dies on our lips when Catherine opens the door to our cell and storms in.

* * *

I get up immediately, moving to block her from the others. From experience I know that when Catherine pays you a visit, it isn't a good thing.

"Hey Catherine," I say casually.

"Hi Cammie. I see you guy's are settling in well. How is it? Actually I don't care. I'm here for you, but I'd like the rest of you to come along as well," she says, a gleam in her eye.

"Why?" I ask ready to fight if she says she will hurt them.

"I've decided you need an audience."

* * *

I'm put into the room again. The white one with the drain and the table. I sigh and sit down on it. Zach, Bex, Liz and Macey are behind a wall of one way glass, a fact that Catherine informed me of quite happily. I hope they will be okay. I never wanted them to see me being tortured. Will, the guy that last tortured me walks into the room.

"Hey Cam. Guess what?" He says.

"You're going to let me go and give me a sorry for my rudeness, tendency to rape you and overall psychoticness card?"

Will makes a face at me. "No. I get to torture you and rape you today." He pulls out a whip. "Anything to tell your friends?"

"I love you Zach," I say, then I spit in Will's face. He glares at me and brings the whip down. I force myself not to flinch.

"Does Zach know how good you are in bed?" Will asks me.

"Go to hell," I spit in his face again.

**A/N Don't forget to review. Also I'm thinking I might do a one shot of Cammie's funeral, set after Only The Good Spy Young as a, what if the Circle had killed her kind of thing. Anybody interested?**


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N Hey guys. Thanks so much for your glowing reviews of my last chapter. Please enjoy this one. I know it is really, really short, but don't be to harsh, I needed it that way so that I didn't write myself into a corner. Please review. Also I went ahead and wrote that one-shot I mentioned last chapter. It is called Out Of The Cold. Feel free to check it out and tell me what you think.**

Day: 4

He watches Cammie sleep. He was supposed to be sleeping too, but he couldn't. Nobody else is awake so he watches Cammie sleep. Even with the scars and the haunted look that is always in her eyes nowadays, she is beautiful, more beautiful than Macey, more beautiful than any other girl in the world. After what he's just been forced to watch though, he doesn't think he can call her a girl. That man, Will, had done his best to break Cammie and the only thing she had said was, "how's this going for you? Want a coffee break yet? I've got nowhere to be." He had raped her and whipped her and she hadn't cried, she hadn't screamed. She had been cocky and rude and had spit in his face. Even from another room, he had been able to feel the hate radiating off of her. She was not a girl and quite frankly, he doesn't think she has been for quite some time. As she sleeps her hair fans out around her head and her body shakes from nightmares that he doesn't think he wants to know about. She looks so young, so vulnerable he wants to cry. He doesn't though because Zachary Goode doesn't cry. Ever. Even while watching his girlfriend be tortured and raped. Not even then. Then, Zachary Goode tried not to get himself killed by charging a guard or better yet, his mother. Catherine Goode. I'll kill her, he vows to himself. One day soon, I'll kill her. With that thought circulating through his head, he hears Cammie screaming, sitting bolt upright in bed, eyes wide open and goes to calm her down. I'll kill her, he thinks again.

Cammie's POV:

I wake up screaming. I scream until I feel Zach's arms around me, until I feel his lips in skin, until I hear his voice telling me it's okay. That I'm safe. I cling to Zach, taking comfort in his familiar smell and the way he feel against me. After a few minutes, I pull back.

"I'm okay." I say, looking into his green eyes. "I'll be fine." I see three sets of eyes peering at us through the relative darkness of our cell. Apparently, my screaming woke the girls.

"You might be okay Cam, but we're not," he gestures to Bex, Macey, Liz and himself. "We're not okay," he whispers.

"You have to be." I look at them all. "You can't let them see how much they hurt you, you can't let them see you scared. You can't let them win. You have to be okay even when you're not."

"Cam," says Liz, "what if they take one of us?"

My heart breaks. "They won't. I won't let them Lizzie." They look at me in disbelief, knowing that if they want to, I won't be able to stop them. I will though, because I have a plan. Not a plan that can be voiced under the watchful eyes of the guards monitoring us from the video camera mounted on the wall. I use a sign language thing we'd made up in ninth grade to ask Liz to disable the camera for a minute. She does and I look at them. "They won't because we are getting out of here."


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N Hey everybody. Enjoy. Please don't forget to review and if you haven't already, check out my one-shot called Out Of The Cold. **

Day: 5

We spent the majority of yesterday planning our escape. Liz worked some kind of miracle and had the guards convinced that the security camera was just malfunctioning and so we were able to talk in relative safety (ignoring the fact that we were at a circle base). Our plan sucks. We have zero weapons, no floor plan and no resources. On top of that, we need to save Bex's parents so our escape is also a rescue. We're screwed. Not very professional terminology, but true. Our plan is basically to wing it. I think I can get Charlie to help us but as nice as he has been to me in the time I've known him, he has his wife and son to think about and if he helps us, life for the three of them will become unbelievably dangerous. So yeah, we're screwed. Nobody came to get me yesterday so today, somebody probably will. Hopefully it will be Charlie because if not, I won't even be able to attempt to enlist his help. We plan to leave the second somebody comes in. Not quite sure how we'll do that. If we can't get Charlie to help, we are going to have to take a hostage so that we can find our way around the building and to the Baxter's, assuming they are here and alive. For Bex's sake, I didn't voice that thought.

* * *

It is early in the morning. My internal clock is telling me that it is about 6:14am. Liz and Macey are sharing the bed and Bex, Zach and I are on the floor. Bex is curled up against the wall and I'm curled up against Zach. His arm is draped across my chest, pulling me in close to his body. Even though we are in a Circle cell and will probably be dead by the end of the day, I am happy. I think I should see a doctor because obviously there is something wrong with my brain. I turn my head and see that Bex is now sitting up, her back to the wall, her eyes open. Disengaging myself from Zach, I walk towards her.

"Hey," she says when she sees me.

I sit down, "hey."

Bex looks at me, her eyes scared. "What if they're dead?"

"Then they're dead," I answer quietly. "Bex, if I've learned anything it is that some things you can't control, some things you have to accept. When I found out where my father's body was, I didn't know what to do. I wanted to kill every member of the Circle, but that wouldn't have changed the fact that he was dead. If your parents are dead, you'll keep going. You'll grieve, you'll cry, you'll get angry but you'll keep going because you have to, because you don't have a choice."

"Thanks Cam," she says with a watery smile.

"Anytime, now what are you going to do when we get out of here?"

"What?"

"When we get out, what are you going to do? It's a game I played with myself all summer. I would try to think of the most ridiculous thing I could possibly do and promise myself that when I escaped, I would go and do it."

She grins. "Okay. I'll go to Disney World and assault Mickey Mouse, then force him to ride It's A Small World with me."

"You'll assault mickey Mouse?"

"Yeah, why not? It's not like anybody will be able to stop me and I have good friends who'll bail me out of jail,, even if it is in Florida." We both bust out laughing.

"Okay, I'd take a vacation where nobody tries to kidnap or torture me and all I have to do is sit on a beach. I'll be a civilian for a week."

"Like that'll happen," says Bex with a smile. We both laugh again.

Macey throws her pillow at our heads. "Shut up," she moans. "We have to pull off an escape/rescue today so I'd like to sleep until at least 8:00. If I'm going to die I might as well be well rested." That just makes us laugh harder. Zach groans and Liz lifts her head to glare at us. We end up talking until the door opens at about 10:00am. It is Charlie.

* * *

Liz disables the cameras again and Zach and I explain to Charlie what we want him to do.

"Cam, you know I like you, but your asking a lot. If I run, my family dies. I can't."

"You have to Charlie," I say. "If you don't, we all die here. Bex's parents die too." He'd confirmed what we'd guessed and we now knew they were here. "Please," I'm begging now.

"My son and my wife Cammie. I can't just leave them."

"We'll take them with us."

"We can't."

"Please. If we escape and you don't stop us Catherine will kill you. Charlie, you won't be able to stop us. If you come with us, we can get your wife and child and you have a chance of living."

"Cammie, I can't," he sounds like he wants to cry.

"You can. Do remember what you told me when they took me to my father's grave? Charlie, you told me that one day I would get free. That I would live the life he never got the chance to. Well now is my chance and I'm asking you, no begging you, to help me. Please help me."

He looks at me with an almost fatherly gleam in his eyes and I realize that that is how I see him. A second father. I don't know if I can do this without him. "Okay." He says. "Okay."

"Where does your family live?" I ask him.

"Switzerland."

"Then after this, we steal a plane to Switzerland and we pick up your family. Zach can fly."

"Okay. Okay. Let's go."

I turn to my friends and Zach slips his hand into mine. "Let's go guys. We have a prison break to orchestrate."

* * *

We walk out the door then break into a run, following Charlie through the halls until we reach a door. Bex kicks it open and rushes into the room without waiting for backup and completely disregarding protocol. Abe and Grace Baxter are propped up against a wall in a small rundown room with no bed but a pile of blood covered sheets balled up in a corner that look like they'd been used to bandage wounds. They are both pale and shaky but not hurt to badly. They aren't missing limbs, they aren't bleeding heavily, there aren't any open wounds and everybody is conscious. It is better than I had dared to hope for. They jump to there feet when they see us. Bex runs to them and hugs them.

"We don't have time for a meet and greet guys. Let's go." I bark like an army sergeant. We start running again. We are almost out when I hear the gunshot. I fall.

**A/N Review, review, review!**


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N Hey guys. So this is mostly filler because I sort of needed to get from point A to B in this chapter. Sorry. Anyway, please review and enjoy, even if this sucks. Thanks for taking the time to read my story. Hope it's good.**

_I'm running, staggering past trees and rocks. I put my hand against a pine and stop to rest. I can't rest though and force my feet to move. I'm leaving a blood trail. I think that's bad but I can't remember why. My head is bloody from where a guard slammed my head with the butt of his gun as I jumped out of the van they had been using to move me to another Circle house. I hear a gunshot and drop to the ground. I scramble back to my feet and keep running. I trip over a tree root but manage to stay upright. I can see the men chasing me now. There is a cliff ahead of me. I can hear running water. I jump just as another gunshot rings out._

When I come to again, I am on a plane. All I remember from our escape was blacking out when I heard the gunshot. I push myself into a sitting position and look around. It's a transport plane full of crates. I hear somebody say, "she's up."

"How are you?" Asks Macey kneeling beside me. Bex joins her at my side.

"I've been worse." I answer. "Where's Zach? Flying the plane?" They exchange a look. I have a bad feeling. "Where's Zach? Macey where's Zach? Macey. Answer me. Where is Zach?" I'm frantic now, yelling. "Zach? Zach? Oh my god, Macey what happened? Where is Zach."

Bex puts a restraining hand on my shoulder well Macey talks. "He's here Cam. He's here. Calm down."

I relax slightly but not much. "Then why can't I see him? What happened?"

"That gunshot right before you collapsed? Cammie, it hit Zach. It's bad Cam. Really bad."

I shove both Bex and Macey aside and see Zach lying on a cot. He is covered in blood and is the color of paper. I swing my legs over the side of the cot I'm lying on and stumble to his side. "Zach, can you hear me? Zach?" He groans and shifts, reacting to my voice. Blood pools on the bandages that I'm guessing Liz put on him. I let out a moan when I see how much there is.

I hear a voice. "I pulled out the bullets, cleaned and stitched the wound and then wrapped it," says Charlie. So it hadn't been Liz it had been Charlie.

"Thanks Charlie."

"Yeah well, I had some practice over the summer." I cringe invouluntarily remembering the time Catherine had shot me for fun. She'd been bored and had decided to come and torture me.

"Will he need to go to the hospital? The girls say he will."

"Cammie, a bullet collapsed his right lung. If he doesn't get to a hospital. He'll die."

"Charlie, he can't get to a hospital. We have to go get your family. I promised you that we'd get your family."

"Cam, he has maybe ten minutes more. We are about to land at a hospital, we'll drop you and Zach there, get my family and pick the two of you up tomorrow on the way to Roseville."

I look into the eyes of a man who has given so much to help me and make a decision. "We can't afford to land Charlie. Every second we waste is a second your son, Ian, and your wife, Anna, could be killed. We can't land." I turn my head and yell over my shoulder, "Bex. Tell whoever's flying the plane to go straight to Switzerland. As close to Charlie's house as we can get."

"Are you sure?" Bex asks me.

"Just do it," I say through gritted teeth as I press a wadded up t-shirt to Zach's bandages, trying to soak up the blood that has escaped the stiches and bandaging. "Bex, just do it."

"Okay," she says, then yells, "Liz, go straight to Switzerland. As close to Charlie's place as you can get us."

I stare at her, momentarily forgetting the life threatening circumstances my boyfriend was in. "Liz is flying the plane? Our Liz? I thought it would be one of your parents."

Macey smiles at me from upturned crate she is perched on. "Yeah, Liz is flying. Grace and Abe are in there with her though. Neither of them know how to fly but they insisted on doing something. They also pointed out that they outranked us so we couldn't really say no."

"Besides," adds Bex, "you'd have to have a death wish to say no to my parents."

I give a strained laugh and turn back to Zach. I make sure nobody can see my face because I know that fear is written all over it.


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N Hey, thanks for the great reviews. So a lot of you said that you didn't get a notification for the previous chapter. I re-posted it so I hope you got an email after I did that. If you didn't and you haven't read it, go read it because otherwise this won't make any sense to you. Other than that, enjoy and as always, review:)**

We are losing altitude, coming in to land in Charlie's massive backyard. Well, no not a backyard, a farmers field. Charlie lives on a farm in Switzerland. It makes me want to know how he ended up working for the Circle. I make a mental note to ask him later. I feel the plane land and Charlie, Abe and Grace jump out and sprint towards the house. Within minutes they are back, Charlie's wife and child in tow. By the time they are on the plane and we are in the air again, Zach is almost out of time. His blood has soaked through every cloth I have tried to stop it with. If we don't get him to a hospital now, he will bleed out. In desperation, I remove my shirt to use as a bandage. We are out of cloth. Macey looks at us and yells at Liz to take us to the nearest hospital as fast as she can. I choke on my tears and tell Zach to be strong, to hold on. I know that he probably won't be able to.

* * *

_I hold her back as she screams in grief. She had just watched her son bleed out after a bullet aimed at me hit him in the chest. There was nothing I could have done to save him once he'd been hit. Nothing either of us could have done, so I hold her back as she screams and cries and begs. Mourning a son that will never come back. Never grow up. Never go to prom. Have a first kiss. Get married. Have kids. Never. All because of me. All because of the Circle. I feel a crack starting in my shield._

* * *

I pull myself back to the present and try to wipe away that memory. How I'd felt his heart throbbing beneath my hands as I'd tried desperately to stop the flow of blood I'd caused. How I'd known even then that it wouldn't be enough. That somebody would always die. That somebody will not be Zach. I start to beg. "Zach, Zach. Don't be that somebody. Don't make me have to do this again. I can't do this again. Please baby, hold on, just hold on. Please," I whisper. "Please. Zach I can't do this without you. I can't. I've tried and I can't. I love you. I've always loved you. Don't go. Not know. Not after everything." The plane lands and somebody tries to pull me away from Zach. I kick out and here a bone snap. I turn around ready for more and see Bex sprawled on the ground. "Oh my God. I'm so sorry Bex. Can you walk?"

"I'll be fine. You only broke my hand. I used it to block your kick. It was the force of it that knocked me down."

* * *

I give Bex a quick nod and a weak smile then pull Zach into my arms and run out of the plane and onto the street after exiting what looks like a school field. Liz landed at a school. I want to laugh but don't have time. I hail the nearest taxi and tell the man to go straight to the nearest hospital knowing that Bex, Liz, Abe, Grace, Charlie, Anna and Ian will be right behind me. I keep pressure on Zach's wound the whole way to the hospital and when we arrive I jump out of the cab with him in my arms, not bothering to pay the driver. I run into the emergency room and start yelling for help. When a nurse comes running I start rattling off his injuries and symptoms. "Multiple gunshot wounds, only one fatal. Collapsed lung, broken rib and a lot of blood loss. He's going to die if you don't get him into an operating room now."

"How long since he was hit?" Asks the nurse as she and I lift him onto a gurney.

"About an hour. A little more maybe."

"It's a miracle he's still alive." She tells me.

"Yeah well, my companions and I have pretty good medical skills." I say nodding to my friend who had just run in the door. "We get like this quite a bit in our line of work." I add with a dry smile.

"Uh...okay," from her expression, I was pretty sure she thought we were gangbangers or something. She glances at my friends and her eyes widen as she sees Abe and Grace. "Aren't those the missing MI6 agents?" She asks in a whisper.

"Yes," I say and start pushing Zach down the hallway toward a door marked operations. I break into a run and he groans well the nurse tries to catch up with me. I look at her bewildered expression and have to grin. "We're CIA," I tell her. Her eyes get so big I think they'll fall out of her head. "Welcome to my world." Then I hand my boyfriend over to the doctors and slide down to the floor, my head in between my knees.


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N Hey. Enjoy this chapter. Please don't forget to review, also have a nice May 24 weekend if you celebrate Victoria day and have a May 24 weekend. Also chapter 20! Also (lots of also's) the person who wanted to post this story to their blog, feel free.**

They are still operating on Zach and I am trying not to freak out just yet. I'm also beginning to wonder about the wisdom of revealing our profession to that nurse. Heat of the moment I guess. After my brain has excused itself for blowing our cover, my mind drifts to other things. What if the circle shows up? It has been two hours since they took him into that room. We've been immobilized for far to long. By now, they know where we are. Catherine already will have had people watching hospitals. Although she doesn't need us, it is a matter of pride for her. I had not thought about this when we ran. I'd been focused on getting out. Not the aftermath. I should have known Catherine would not stop trying to find us even when there wasn't a point. Catherine is a narcissistic, egotistical psychopath who takes pleasure in the pain of others. She doesn't think she can be escaped, thwarted or out thought. In her mind, she is always one step ahead, will always come out on top. I had forgotten how persistent she could be but now that I am running once more, the feelings are flooding back. The instinct to flee before the predator catches it's prey pries at my soul. Although my brain tells me to run, to save myself, my heart tells me differently. I can't leave the boy-man-I love. I can't leave the friends that have risked their lives for me. So I pace in a slow, steady circle, waiting for the people who will try to take us dead or alive. I just hope that no innocent people get caught in the storm.

* * *

"Sit down," Macey orders me.

I turn to look at her and give her my best glare. "No. Zach is in there right now fighting for his life, the Circle will know where we are by now and they'll be coming. So no, I won't sit down."

"Sit down," she says it again. "Cam, if you won't sit down, I will have them sedate you and then you will be helpless if Catherine attacks."

I sit down, shoulders sagging. "I'm already going to be helpless," I whisper.

"What?" says Charlie.

"Nothing." I turn to Charlie's wife and stick out my hand. "Hi Anna, I'm Cammie." She shakes it and I look at the little baby on her knee. "This must be Ian." I say with a smile. Anna nods shyly. "I'm pleased to meet both of you. Charlie talks about you a lot."

"He talks about you a lot too." Says Anna. "I'm happy to finally meet you, even under these circumstances."

I smile at her then get up and move to a seat next to Abe and Grace Baxter. "Are you guys okay?" I ask. They nod. "God, I'm so sorry I didn't get to you sooner. I'm so sorry."

"Cammie," says Grace. "You did the best you could and by the looks of it, we got off easier then you." She gestures to the bruises lining my face and my broken wrist. "I'm guessing that is only a small portion of what they did to you."

"Cam, you got us out. That wouldn't have been possible even if it was a carefully planned operation run by MI6 or the CIA. Cammie, you are amazing," Abe tells me.

I feel tears in my eyes and the guilt is threatening to rip me apart. I'd gotten people hurt. Zach might die because of me. "Thank you, but believe me I am not amazing. Not at all."

"Open your eyes Cammie. You have been through more than most agents do in there entire career and you aren't even done school. You are one of the most talented spies I have ever seen. You are strong and young and have such a great life ahead of you. Cammie, you are amazing. Whether or not you see it, you are. Your dad would have been proud."

I throw my arms around his neck. "Thank you Mr. Baxter."

Macey stands up. "Who wants coffee? I'm going to go and get coffee." She gets a yes from everyone. "Okay then, including me, that is eight coffee's. I assume Ian isn't having one?" Anna nods. "Okay then. Cammie and Liz, come help me carry. Everybody is getting their coffee black. If that is a problem, get your own coffee." I see Bex hide a smile behind her hand at that. I wipe off my face and follow Macey and Liz towards the cafeteria, following the signs in the halls.

* * *

As we carry the eight black coffee's back to the ER waiting room Macey pulls us Liz and I into a bathroom. She then proceeds to take the coffee's, set them on a counter and turn us both to look into the bathroom mirror. "We look like we've been through hell," she states bluntly.

I look at our reflection. "We have," I say tiredly.

"Yeah, we have," saying Liz quietly. "Cam, I thought they were going to kill you. That man, he raped you and beat you. Catherine burned you."

"I know Liz." I say softly. "Believe me I know."

"Cammie, why did you run in the summer?" Macey says. "Why didn't you just stay? You didn't have to go, you didn't have to run," her voice breaks.

"I ran so that they wouldn't hurt you, so that nobody would get hurt to protect me. I ran because I was out of options and I was scared." I look into the mirror as I speak and focus on my eyes. They are sad and I look older then I am. "What if he dies?" I ask, feeling tears sliding down my face.

"He won't," says Liz. "He won't because if he does, we will bring hell down on his head when we get to heaven."

I laugh as I wipe away my tears and grab the coffee I'd been carrying from the counter. "Once Zach is out of surgery, we need to go shopping and take a shower. I will not spend another day looking like this," I say.

Macey grins at me. "You got it. Now lets go give everybody their coffee's. Bex will have a fit if she doesn't get her caffeine soon."

* * *

It turns out Bex was having a fit anyways. When we'd gotten back to the lobby we'd found her screaming at a nurse who was trying to keep her from seeing Zach.

"I don't give a damn about your bloody protocol," she screams, her accent thick. "You are going to move and let me see him because if you don't, you're the one that will end up in an operation room."

Suppressing a smile, I hand the coffee in my hand to Charlie and go to restrain Bex. Although I have to break her pinky to do it, she finally backs down and sets the finger with a telling glance in my direction. I then turn to the nurse and say in a low and deadly voice, "you will let myself and my friends see my boyfriend now." She gulps, nods and motions for us to follow her. With a grin, we do.

* * *

Zach is in a plain white room on the seventh floor of the hospital. Surgery recovery. He is pale but awake and more importantly, alive. I launch myself onto his bed and let myself breath for the first time all day. I kiss him until I can't breath and then I kiss him some more. When I break away he smiles and looks around the room. "I see we all got out." There's a chorus of yeah's, yes's and Bex lets out a "well duh." Zach looks at Anna and Ian and introduces himself then he looks at me and says, "we have to leave. They know where we are by now Cammie. We need to go."

"I know," I say. "Will you be okay to do that?"

"If somebody picks us up? Yeah."

"Okay then, we'll leave by tonight." I say... and then I call my mom.


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N Hey everyone. Sorry I haven't updated in so long. Life got very busy. I'll try to update soon but in the meantime, enjoy this chapter. Please don't forget to review:)**

She answers on the first ring. "Hello?" she says, impatient.

"Mom. Is this phone safe?"

"Cammie, kiddo? Are you okay? Are you safe? Where are you?" I hear her yell for Abby and Joe.

"Mom. I need to know if this phone is secure and I need to know now." On the off chance that Catherine doesn't know where we are, I don't want to give her any help.

"Yes Cam, it's secure. At least we think it is, but with the Circle, you never know."

Without thinking about it I say something it has been years since I've heard. "BetaZ10NeutralR." I hear my mother inhale sharply.

"Got it. We're coming. We'll find you." I say okay and am about to hang up when she stops me. "Cammie?"

"Yeah mom?"

"I love you."

I swallow hard and try not to cry. "I love you too mom. Hurry."

"We will. I'll be there by the morning. Be safe baby."

I hang up and turn back to my friends. "She'll be here in the morning."

"What did that code mean?" Asks Liz, never able to pass up an opportunity to learn. "I've never heard it before."

Everybody looks at me expectantly, even Zach. "It's a code my parents used to use when they went on separate missions," I answer quietly. "Beta tells the other person that there is a harmed team member. Then you use the first initial of the harmed person. The number of people in the group and the code for the country you're in. My parents made up their own and since Switzerland was neutral during WWII, it's code is Neutral. The last letter stands for either green, yellow or red. Red being the most dangerous situation and green being the least. They made it so that if one of them needed to be taken out of a Country quickly and without going through the channels, the other would know where they were without alerting the enemy."

"That's smart," says Liz. The others all nod.

I look out the window and see that it is dark. I glance at the clock on the wall. It is past midnight. "Go to sleep guys, I'll keep watch." With a lot of grumbling and complaints, they lay down on the floor of Zach's hospital room.

"Beat's the cell," Macey mutters when I toss her a pillow. "My neck is so sore from sleeping on that floor."

Zach snorts from his bed. "Like you spent one night on the floor. You slept in the bed with Liz the whole time."

"No," she defends herself. "One night Cammie needed the bed."

"Yeah, I needed it." I grumble from a chair I'd pulled into the door way. "You never did, you just wanted it. "

"Damn straight," she says.

Bex kicks her, "shut up." I hear Charlie, Anna Abe and Grace trying not to laugh.

"What," Macey asks them.

"It's just that we are running for our lives and you four are bickering like little kids. The only one who is quiet is Liz and that because she is already asleep." Abe laughs.

We all make an indignant sound but eventually they fall asleep. I drag my chair into the hall trying not to wake anybody up.

* * *

After about two hours, I'm glad I volunteered to take watch. I wouldn't have been able to sleep anyways. Know that we are free, I am trying to block out the most recent of my torture to little success. I swear I can still feel Will moving inside me, can see Catherine burning my skin. I have to put a lot of effort into staying in my chair well every part of my body is screaming for me to run. I can't though. I have my friends here. Zach is here. Still, I'm probably putting them in more danger by staying here. Catherine wants me. It is a fact, plain and simple. I can't understand why she hasn't come yet. I know she knows where we are. I can't sit anymore so I pace. Around and around I pace, over and over, faster and faster until I'm jogging. I hear a door open behind me and spin towards the sound with my fists raised. I stumble when I see Zach leaning against the door frame. "You should be in bed. How are you even standing?"

He smirks. "I've had my lung collapsed before. Grant has lousy aim and a slippery trigger finger. I scared him once and he shot me. He was aiming for my neck."

"Really?" I say with a grimace, I hate to think of Zach being in pain.

"No, but I'm a spy remember? I'll be fine."

I take his hand and force him to sit in the chair then steal one from the nurses station for myself. I put it beside his chair and sit down, reclaiming his hand with mine. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"Better question," he says. "Are you?"

I force a smile. "I'm fine Zach." I hope he buys it.

"Cam. No your not."

I give up the act, let my shoulders slump. Stop smiling. "No I'm not."

"Want to talk about it?" He asks.

"Not really." Even as I say it the words start tumbling out. "Zach, I'm her again. I'm Summer Me. They took everything from me and when I start to get it all back, they took it again. Zach, I murder people, I cause the murders of other people. Once, when they were chasing me back in Rome, a little boy got in the way of a bullet. He was about four and was just crossing the street but I was there and a Circle member was there and he got in the way of a bullet aimed at my head. He died because of me and then within a week they got me and I was so tired of running. So tired. Zach it is happening again and I don't know what to do. I don't know how to be the sweet, innocent girl my mother wants, I want. I don't know how. I can't know how because I'm not sweet and I'm sure as hell not innocent, but that is all I want. I don't want to run. I don't want to know how to fire a gun. I don't want to have fired a gun. I don't want to be tortured anymore. Zach, I just want to be normal. Well, not normal, normal but spy normal. I want to be able to finish senior year without somebody burning me, whipping me, raping me or maiming me. That was my goal for the year and now it is gone because of Catherine. Zach I want to kill her. I want to kill her so badly that sometimes I can't think about everything else. There are days that because of her, I don't want to get out of bed. I don't want to face the world because everywhere I look I see her or her men. Because every time I turn a corner I am readying myself for an attack. Because everyday, I have to force myself not to turn and run. Run because that's the only way I know to protect everyone around me from myself and myself from them. Zach, I am broken inside but I can't let them see that because then they've won, because then the months they spent torturing me mean something. You know what I say every time somebody come in to torture me? Zach, I say "How's this going for you? Want a coffee break yet? I've got nowhere to be." Zach, I can't do it anymore. I can't do it." I let the tears fall then and he hold me until I'm all cried out.

"Gallagher Girl, they will never win because you are here and you are strong and you are mine." He kisses me. "You are beautiful and resourceful and kind." He kisses me again. "You make every room you step into brighter," he kisses me for a third time, "and you are no murderer." He kisses me again and this time our kiss spirals into a deep need and passion. I feel like I'm on fire, like I will burn. When he pulls away, he leans his forehead against mine. "You are no murderer." He wipes away the tears still clinging to my cheeks. "No murderer at all."

"Thank you," I whisper.

"Anytime," he says. "Cammie, I love you, no matter what."

"Love you too." I tell him. I mean it.

* * *

We sit like that the whole night and in the morning, we all go down to the cafeteria for breakfast. Zach complains the whole way there because I forced him to use a wheel chair but shuts up once he sees that they are serving waffles. The waffles aren't very good but it is a lot better than the food we've been getting. After we finish we go back up to Zach's room and sit on the floor. I am more worried then I was last night. We have been here for almost 24 hours and the Circle hadn't shown up. That means they are planning something or waiting for something. It means surprises. Surprises are a very bad thing when you're a spy. Nobody is saying anything and eventually I fall asleep. When I wake up it's to my mother's voice yelling "Cammie."

* * *

My eyes shoot open. My head is on Zach's lap and my mother is standing over us. "Mom." I jump up and give her a hug. Joe and Abby come into the room at a dead run. "You found them." They say at the same time.

"Joe," says Zach with a grin. "How're you doing?" He goes to get up but groans.

I pull out of my mom's embrace and help Zach up. "You shouldn't be sitting on the floor ," I inform him with a frown.

"Yeah well, Anna and Ian took the bed and I let them. Besides, you needed something to use as a pillow." He kisses my forehead then walks over to hug Joe.

"Good to see you Zach," Joe tells him.

"Same," he returns.

Abby and my mother, who are talking to Abe, Grace, Macey, Liz and Bex, notice Anna, Charlie and Ian at the same time. "Who're they?" Abby asks bluntly.

I walk over to stand beside Charlie, who is sitting in the chair next to the bed that Anna and Ian are lying in, still sound asleep. "This is Charlie, Anna and Ian. Charlie is a circle member who helped us escape." I see Joe, Abby and mom stiffen. "He was with me over the summer and is probably one of the kindest people I've ever known," I defend him. "Anna is his wife and Ian is his son. We stopped on our way to the hospital to pick them up."

Abby looks at me. "How in the world did you guys get here?"

"I flew a plane that Bex and Macey stole." Liz grins.

"Where is this plane now?"

"A school field about three blocks from here. We didn't think it would be wise to risk moving Zach that far. Whatever he tells you, he is not fine. Quite frankly neither is Cam or Mr. and Mrs. Baxter."

"Yeah," says Bex. "They aren't fine. Mom and dad are probably the best out of the four of them, Zach's the worst. Cammie's not in a great state. The rest of us our fine but we should leave, like now."

Everybody nods and Charlie shakes Anna awake. She grabs a sleeping Ian and Joe leads us to the roof where they have a waiting helicopter. The Circle is still nowhere to be seen. I am very scared now. They should be here, guns blazing, fists swinging. I push those feelings aside and help Zach into the helicopter. We take off and as we leave the roof, I hear a loud bang and the hospital below us starts to burn, then explodes. I stare out my window at the chaos below that I have caused by being there, by staying there and by leaving there. I turn my head with tears in my eyes to look at Mr. Solomon. "You once told us that people do things for six reasons," I tell him. "Love, faith, fear, boredom, greed and revenge. You missed one."

"Which one would that be?" He asks me.

"To send a message."


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N So I know this is really, really short, 379 words doesn't really count as a chapter. Sorry, I just didn't want to write myself into one of those dreadful corners and, quite frankly, I need to start to end this. Enjoy and review to tell me what you think. Also, what do you think Cammie should do next?**

I sit numbly, Zach's hand in mine, listening to the whirring of the blades above my head. A hospital full of innocent people is gone because of me. I doubt there will be more than 100 survivors, if that. None of those people deserved to die. None of them had any quarrel with the Circle, with Catherine. They just had me. I feel like I am holding that little boy's mother back again, like I have his blood staining my hands and his mother's tears soaking my shirt. Again, innocent people have died because they have been near me. People who didn't know me, didn't know Catherine, didn't know anything about the Circle of Cavan. It is my fault they are dead even if I didn't plant the bombs, click the detonators. I was there, that is enough. I don't cry. I can't cry. I won't cry. To cry is to give in. To let them win. They won't win, not today, not ever. They will never win. I won't let them. I am tired of being sad. I am tired of running. I am tired of death. I am tired of being tired. I'm tired of being strong. I let my shoulders slump, let my head fall forward. My hair covers my face and I let my features rearrange themselves into a picture of grief and pain. I don't cry but I don't pretend that I am not shaken by the death of so many innocent people. After about a minute like that I sit back up, square my shoulders and take a deep breath. I'm tired of being tired so I will end this. I have the list. It is embedded into my mind like a microchip. It is a part of me. It is time I used it.


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N Hey everyone. Please enjoy this chapter. I thought that we needed a mother daughter scene and so here it is. Don't forget to review. Also, for those of you who haven't heard yet, GG6 will be called United We Spy and is supposed to be released in September.**

_I hold her back as she screams in grief. She had just watched her son bleed out after a bullet aimed at me hit him in the chest. There was nothing I could have done to save him once he'd been hit. Nothing either of us could have done, so I hold her back as she screams and cries and begs. Mourning a son that will never come back. Never grow up. Never go to prom. Have a first kiss. Get married. Have kids. Never. All because of me. All because of the Circle. I feel a crack starting in my shield._

_The scene changes._

_I reach for the gun at my hip, gingerly taking it from it's holster. It feels foreign and dangerous in my hands. I lift it, aiming at a piece of paper I had pinned to a tree. I fire. The gun jumps in my hands and my arms swing back from the recoil. The bullet came nowhere close to hitting the target. I raise the gun again, keeping a tighter grip this time. I aim and fire. The bullet just grazed the corner of my target. I breath in sharply, in my hands this weapon could kill somebody. I think of Zach._

_ "How far are those targets?" I'd asked him upon seeing the Blackthorne shooting range._

_ "Far." He'd answered me. He'd been trained to take lives, me to save them. Right now it would have been better to be trained as a killer. No, not a killer, an assassin. I pull my thoughts away from Zach and focus on the gun in my hands and the target in front of me. By the end of the afternoon, my aim was near perfect. I don't want to think of what Zach would say if he could see me now._

_The scene changes again._

_"Oh, Cammie. Here Cammie, here Cammie." Catherine. I hate her. I'm hiding behind a blue transport truck. Well, I think it was blue at one point, it looks like the driver had a nasty accident, and although his remains aren't here, the truck is and looks like it has been for several years. I have my gun in my hand, but it only has one bullet left. I have promised myself to save it for me. If they are going to take me, it won't be alive. I'm somewhere just outside of Rome. I have been trying to ditch the circle all day, but Catherine is very good at tailing people, even if they are pavement artists like me. I have a suspicion that before she took the job of evil assassin lady, she was very much like me. A pavement artist. I almost want to laugh at the thought. I hear a loud bang, the sound of a bullet hitting the truck. I can't run anymore. I new this day was coming for weeks now. You can only run for so long before you have to stop. In my case, it wouldn't matter if I could run anymore because I hear a bang and feel a bullet enter my leg. I go down onto one knee and without thinking, lift the gun in my hand, aim and fire. It enters Catherine's arm, but she doesn't waiver. I realize what I just did to late. They will have me alive now. I hope they'll kill me. I have to much blood on my hands to ever go back to my life the way it was, not that they'll ever let me. I picture Zach. Zach jumping off a train into the middle of nowhere. Zach his hands in my hair, pressing his mouth to mine. Zach. A hand coming from behind me presses a sickly sweet smelling cloth to my mouth. I'm to tired to fight. I let the chloroform wash over me, let it force me into a black oblivion. I welcome it._

_The scene changes again._

_We take off and as we leave the roof, I hear a loud bang and the hospital below us starts to burn, then explodes. I stare out my window at the chaos below that I have caused by being there, by staying there and by leaving there. I turn my head with tears in my eyes to look at Mr. Solomon. "You once told us that people do things for six reasons," I tell him. _

_ "Love, faith, fear, boredom, greed and revenge. You missed one."_

_ "Which one would that be?" He asks me._

_ "To send a message."_

I wake up with a scream and somebodies arms immediately come around me. I breath in the familiar scent until I can breath again.

"You okay?" Zach asks, his arms still around me.

"Just give me a minute," I answer into his shoulder. Eventually my minute is up and as I pull out his arms I give him a kiss. "I'm good," I murmur against his lips. He nods and kisses me again. Somebody coughs and we split apart, both of us groaning in pain as our respective injures object to the sudden movement.

"That is my daughter," my mother says.

I'm suddenly angry at her. "Really mom? Because if I remember correctly, you could barley look at me, let alone talk to me before we went to Paris."

"Cammie, I'm sorry. I was scared, so scared. You killed seven men and when you came back you not only had the son of a newly dead ambassador in tow, you didn't seem to feel anything for the people you had put a bullet in. Cammie, their bodies weren't even cold yet and you didn't seem to feel a thing." Mom yells the last part and I stare at her as does every body else on the helicopter.

"I didn't feel anything?" My voice is low, even and dangerous. "I didn't feel anything?" I say again. Zach's arm tightens around my waist, as a restraint or a support I don't know. "Mom, I felt so much it was better not to feel anything. It still is. Do you know what I spent my summer doing?" She shakes her head. "No, of course you don't, but I've been remembering. There was a day that I was running from some people who where tailing me and they had just gotten so close, to close. I had been staying away from crowds even though they made it easier to lose the tails because they where trigger happy bastards from the circle but I didn't have a choice anymore. "I am yelling now, letting every bit of anger I'd been feeling towards my mom come out into my words, letting every bit of anger I'd been feeling towards the circle come out in my words. Everyone is staring at me because it isn't very often that I lose my temper like this. "I didn't have a choice and so I ran into a really busy part of the town I was in. I was crossing a street when I heard the shot and then I heard a body hitting the ground and when I turned around there was a little boy, still holding his mother's hand lying on the middle of the road. The mother hadn't even realized what had happened yet, she was just standing there. When her brain finally processed the scene in front of her, she started screaming and crying and praying and I just held her. I couldn't do anything else so I just held her as her son bled out on the ground in front of us. I tried to save that little boy but there was nothing I could have do so I just left him there and held his mother. I didn't care if the circle got me right then. I was done. Mom, because of me that little boy died. Killing those circle members that day, it felt amazing, it felt like I had finally done something right." My voice breaks. "They weren't the first people I'd killed mom. After you kill once, you learn to push back the feelings. To fight of the grief and the pain and the anger. You learn to move on, to forget, to ignore. They weren't the first and I doubt they'll be the last." When I finish, I stare of into space well everyone else stares at me, slack jawed. They have never heard that story before. The only person who looks normal is Zach who heard a version of this the night before in the hospital. I lean my head against his shoulder and close my eyes. Nobody talks for the rest of the flight.


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N Hey, sorry for the wait. I had a lot of things going on for school. Enjoy this chapter and please review. This story is at 94 reviews right now and I'd really like this chapter to bring it to 100.**

When we land at Gallagher the helicopter is still silent. I take Zach's hand and pull him up with me and then we leave our seats and hop out. The second my feet hit the ground, I break into a run. I can hear Zach running behind me, trying to keep up but I've spent my summer running from the Circle and he's just been shot. Even though I've been tortured, I can still move quickly. It isn't the first time I've been running after being tortured. I move towards the forest and, without realizing it, go to the gun range that Abby and Joe had set up to test me. It is still set up and off to the right is a large metal container. There is no lock on it. Weird. I open it and sigh when I see what it houses. Guns. It's not like I'm surprised, what else do you keep at a gun range? I grab a hand gun and curl my fingers around it. I take comfort in the way it feels in my hand, the cool black metal menacing and unyielding, so like the Circle but controllable. So like my fears and worries, but disposable. It is a nightmare not for me, but for my enemies. It is powerful but still a part of me wishes I had never picked one up, never learned to kill. The more reasonable side of me says that if I hadn't I'd be dead. I banish my thoughts to the dark recesses of my mind and lose myself in the shooting. Targets I can barley see, can only sense, I hit. Something moves behind me and I spin around, gun held steadily in front of me, eyes on my target, finger resting on the trigger. Zach just smirks and holds up his hands in mock surrender.

"I could have shot you." I tell him angrily.

"But you didn't," he returns, still smirking.

"No, but I could have. I'm good at killing people on case you haven't noticed."

"Gallagher Girl, you are not a killer."

"No? Then why was there a whole hospital of sick helpless people blown to ruble? Why is it that everywhere I go, people die either by my hand or because of me? Zach, I am a killer, a murderer."

"Killing somebody doesn't make you a murderer. Cammie how many people have you actually killed? You, with your brain, your actions."

I don't even have to think about it. "57. Not including those who have died for me or because of me, 57."

For a minute he just stares at me, then in to quick strides, he is at my side. He takes my face in his hands and lifts my chin up. "How many of those people would have killed you if they'd had the chance?"

"All of them, but that doesn't change the fact that their blood is on my hands, same as the rest of the people who have died because of me."

"No, but it makes a difference. Gallagher Girl, you didn't have a choice. You never had a choice in any of this."

"Maybe not," I whisper, looking into his eyes, "but I have to end it."

His grip on my face tightens. "No, you don't. Cammie, you don't have to end this, you can't. You've done enough."

I kiss him, "I have to. If I don't then good, innocent people will die. CIA, MI6. My friends, my family, they will die trying to take down the Circle. I can finish this Zach, I know I can. I won't have more blood of innocent people on my hands. I will finish this . I have to."

Zach must see something in my eyes because the next thing he says is, "okay." I breath a sigh of relief, knowing that only Zach would have had a chance at changing my mind. He looks at me now with the same look in his eyes that I imagine I had a moment before. "Okay, but I am coming. If you don't let me, I will tell everybody you are going."

I look at him and let him see the pain in my eyes, let him see how hard it is for me to even consider letting him come. Putting him in danger. I know I have to though so I agree. "Alright. Alright." He kisses me then, squeezing the gun still in my hand between our bodies. "Don't die on me," I whisper when he pulls away.

"Never."


	25. Chapter 25

**A/N (Read with a British accent for full affect. If you are British please don't take offense, you just have a cool accent. Also, your Queen has been on the throne for 60 years and so today, I will write my A/N with a British accent.) Hello. How are you this fine day? I'm fine, thanks for asking. Thank you all for 100 reviews. I feel quite special. Please don't forget to review and follow and like.**

We leave that night. We don't plan, we don't take anything but a change of clothes, two backpacks and 500 dollars cash which I stole (once again) from Macey. We just leave. It would be romantic, running through the forest with the boy you love, if we weren't running towards something that would probably result in our deaths. Without realizing where I'm leading us, we end up at Mr. Solomon's cabin.

Zach looks at me. "Why are we here?"

"We need time and supplies and this will get us some. They won't look here first because I hid here last time and they'll think I'm smart enough not to use the same place twice. They won't take long to look here though so we need to be gone in the morning." Zach nods and I continue to plan out loud as we simultaneously step over a trip wire and continue to walk towards the front door. "Joe has a cupboard full of money and his shed is still pretty full of supplies. If we go to France, I have some friends that can help us out." I pause and look at Zach as I pull a key to the front door that I grabbed before we left Gallagher. He raises an eyebrow but doesn't say anything. "Zach, this is probably the last time for a while you'll get to sleep soundly with a roof over your head and food in your stomach. If you don't want to come any farther, I understand."

He kisses me until every coherent thought in my head is gone. "I'm not going anywhere," he murmurs against my lips.

I pull back and open the door. "In that case, welcome to the trip to Hell. Admissions free, your safety is not guaranteed and unless you want to die, we don't recommend staying seated at all times."

* * *

I don't disable the cameras. What's the point? They'll be here by the morning anyways. After Zach and I eat the MRE's in Mr. Solomon's pantry, we stock up on supplies. I tell Zach to find as much money and first aid supplies as he can and then I go out to the supplies shed. It is filled with an array of guns, back packs, clothing and quite a bit of hiking gear along with the CIA's latest technology. I grab two hiking backpacks. Two outfits, two pairs of sturdy boots and the majority of the CIA tech. My contacts in France are not exactly CIA, more like CIA targets but beggars can't be choosers. They won't be able to supply us with sate of the art technology but they'll be able to get us new identity's, weapons and food and, if we're lucky, a safe place to spend a few days. We will have to leave everything we took from Gallagher other then the money here. They are identifiable and could trace back to us, which, when you're chasing after a top secret, international terrorist group is a very, very, bad thing. I finish packing the hiking backpacks and go back to the cottage where I add an assortment of MRI's and Zach throws in the money and first aid supplies. Once we are packed, we head into the bedroom and are asleep within five minutes. Our bags are right beside us so that if we have to leave in the night we can. We have to.

* * *

About an hour after I fall asleep, I wake up again. It's a reflex I developed well I was on the run the last time. It had gone away after I'd gotten back to Gallagher but now that I was running again, it was back. I'm glad it was to because I hear movement outside the cottage and see headlights through the window. I jump up, grab both the backpacks and bend over to shake Zach awake. He has barley opened his eyes when I push the pack into his arms and pull him to his feet. "We need to run," I whisper. He nods and we go. Running through the forest, running and running and running, always running.

**Me: Hi Zach, how are you liking your story so far?**

**Zach: Oh, I think it is great. I love the fact that you haven't killed any of us off.**

**Me: Oh, well I thought about it but decided I wouldn't.**

**Zach: Thanks. That is much appreciated by myself and Cammie. We know you are great at writing about funerals because of your other story, Out Of The Cold, so we know you'd have loved writing another funeral scene.**

**Me: Your welcome. So how do you feel about Cammie's plan to go back to France?**

**Zach: Well I was hoping I wouldn't have to go back there for a while but I'll do whatever it takes to bring the Circle to the ground. Oh, sorry I've got to go, there is a dog chasing Cammie and I.**

**Me: Okay, see you next chapter. Bye.**


	26. Chapter 26

**A/N Hey. So very sorry it took me so long to post the chapter. I kept forgetting to write it. Well, please R&R. Don't forget about the second R.**

We steal two identities via their wallet's (which conveniently have passports in them) and head to the airport. We buy two plane tickets and within five hours of stealing the wallets, we are on our way to Paris, France for the second time this month. Zach sleeps the whole flight but I stay awake and alert. Trying to ignore the fact that the last time I was on a plane well on the run, I got in a fist fight with a Circle against in the aisle that was James Bond worthy. When I say James Bond worthy, I mean so utterly public and destructive that somebody should have filmed it. Somebody probably did. I make a mental note to check that later on and get Liz to take it off the internet if somebody did. Then I remember that I'll probably be dead before I get the chance to do that. Then I remember that if I'm dead, so is Zach, so I can't be dead. My mind goes in circles like that for hours. Hours of obsessing over what will happen if something goes wrong, if I die, if I can't bring down the circle, if Zach dies, but Zach can't die, I won't let him. Looking back on the events of yesterday, I can't figure out why I didn't just knock Zach out and run when he asked if he could come with me, why I didn't say no. In my heart though I know why I didn't say no, why I didn't knock him out and go, it is because I love him and I left him once, I can't do it again, I can't do this without him. Not today, not tomorrow, not ever.

* * *

We are outside the Paris airport now and I have Zach hand me the stolen wallets and passport and tell him to wait where he is, then I do what I do best, I become invisible. I weave through the throngs of people milling outside the airport, pick a man and a woman at random and perform a flawless brush pass (without them being aware of it) and make my way back to Zach. I am almost there when I realize I have a tail, I recognize one of them as a circle member. I can't let them find Zach, I can't let them find him because as good of a spy/assassin that he is, he won't be able to loose the Circle. I might be able to, I might be able to get away, but Zach won't. I've gotten away before but Zach hasn't. Zach hasn't and he won't but I have and I will and once I loose them I'll double back for Zach, I will go back and get him.

* * *

I walk for what feels like hours, employing every covert counter surveillance method in the book and then some. I finally loose the tail and double back to get Zach, grabbing a suitcase that somebody had let go of on my way. I pass a bench and grab the sweater hanging off of the back without breaking stride. When I pass by a man distracted by his crying son, I take the ball cap off his head, use the elastic on my wrist to put my hair into a pony tail and pull it through the hole in the hat as I push it onto my head. I see Zach leaning against the wall scanning the crowd. He doesn't recognize me. I grin and decide to have a little fun, for all I know it will be the last I'll have for a while, so I walk up to him and start a conversation.

"Hi, I'm Alyssa." I tell him with a cocky smirk identical to his own and a French accent.

"Oh, hi," he says with a perfect Scottish accent. "I'm Cameron ," I note how easily the lie seems to come and more importantly, that he used my name as his cover.

"So Cameron, what are you planning to do here in the city of love?" I can't believe he hasn't recognized me yet, it's not like I'm wearing a disguise.

"Oh, nothing much. Some sight seeing I guess. I would love to climb the Eiffel Tower." He scans the crowd again.

"Looking for somebody?"

"Oh… yeah, my girlfriend. We are on our first trip together."

I fake a look of disappointment. "Oh, girlfriend."

"Um," he looks uncomfortable, "yeah. I should probably go and find her actually. She went to look for a washroom about 20 minutes ago." He picks up our packs and starts walking away. "Bye, nice meeting you," he tosses over his shoulder.

I drop the act and put my hands on my hips. "Zachary Goode, if you take one more step I swear to God I will leave without you."

He spins around, " Alyssa?"

"I told you to stay here and wait for me to get back." I tell him, hands still on my hips.

"Cammie? How the hell… but I thought… you were Alyssa."

"No kidding." I grin at him and grab my pack out of his hands then take my stolen ball cap off my head and stick it onto his. "Come on, I had some tails but I lost them. Let's not give them a chance to catch up."

"Where are we going?"

I grin at him. "We are going to go catch up with some friends of mine."

"Are they dangerous?"

"Very."


	27. Chapter 27

**A/N Hey everyone. I am very sorry that I haven't updated in so long so please let the mystery of this chapter make it up to you. Enjoy and don't forget to review. **

We scale the fence. Now I know what you're thinking, wow, why'd they do that? In answer, huge mansions equal lots of security which equals cameras which equals traceable… not that the people who live here would have anybody stupid enough to mess with them. Me on the other hand, well lets just say the Circle isn't known for being afraid of dangerous and possibly perilous situations. So we scale the fence. We drop down onto a part of the yard that I know for a fact is in a security blind-spot and find ourselves staring at a huge mansion that is about 250 years old, complete with turrets and stain glass. You know those castles in the fairy tales you used to beg to be read to you at bedtime? Well picture one of those on a slightly smaller scale and you pretty much have the mansion we're staring at. No, I'm not exaggerating.

Zach gapes at me. "Your friends live here?"

"No," I grin at him over my shoulder as I walk towards the house, being carful to keep in the blind-spots. "They just run meth through this place."

"Meth? The people we are going to for help deal meth?"

"Technically they also deal cocaine, but yeah."

"You are crazy Cam. Absolutely crazy. We are hiding from the Circle in a house full of drug dealers? Cammie, why would we be able to trust drug dealers?"

"Because they have saved my life twice, because they are nice people, good people-well other then the drug dealing part-and because they can get us guns and give us a safe place to stay for a while. A safe place where the CIA and Circle won't be able to find us and more importantly, Rebecca Baxter won't be able to find us."

He cracks a smile. "Bex is scarier then the CIA and the Circle?"

"Hell yes," I say in my best British accent. "Hurry up," I add as an after thought.

"Sir, yes sir," he says with a mock solute.

I laugh then lead him to an old tunnel entrance that had once been part of the under ground railroad. It was in fact a complete accident that I knew about it or, quite frankly, this place. I had been running from the Circle in the dark and had scaled the fence without thinking about it. I'd tripped over the trap door which had been left open when the last shipment of Meth had been smuggled through there. It was only luck that had me close the door before the Circle caught up to me. I will admit that it wasn't luck that kept the surprised people at the and of the tunnel from shooting me. That was more brute force and a few illegal moves that I had picked up on my travels. I may or may not have shot a couple of them as well. When we reach the trap door, I bend over and press down on a small rock at the base of a nearby tree . You wouldn't notice the rock if you weren't looking for it. The door swings open and I step down onto the first step of the stairs it reveals. Zach follows, closing the door behind him, and within minutes we are in the master bedroom of the mansion.

* * *

Nobody is in there and so I take Zach's hand and lead him down the hallway towards the kitchen where I know whoever is doing the runs this month will be. Zach and I don't talk as we move down the hall and into the kitchen. When we are almost there, I see a sandy blonde head. I drop Zach's hand and break into a run. He must here my footsteps because he turns around and his face breaks into a grin. He opens his arms and I run straight into them without hesitation. He picks me up and spins me around.

"Cammie!" He says with his arms still wrapped around me.

"James," I shriek.

Zach clears his throat. "Uh… hi."

James sets me down on the floor but doesn't let go of me. "Hi," he says with a grin still plastered on his face, "I'm James, you must be Zach."

"Yeah, I am. How'd you know that?" Zach asks with a frown.

"I told him a lot about you while he was busy keeping me alive over the summer," I inform him, deciding to break the tension.

"Okay then," Zach sticks out his hand. "Pleasure to meet you. Thanks for keeping Cammie alive."

"My pleasure, anything for Cam. She saved me as well. She saved me before I saved her."

Zach nods and I pull away from James and take Zach's hand. "James, can we stay here for a few days?"

"Let me guess, an international terrorist group is after you again?"

"No, we're after them, but they'll have tabs on me and I'd really prefer to be able to plan without having to keep looking over my shoulder and without having to watch anyone die."

James barks out a laugh. "Of course you can stay here. Your room is empty and I'm pretty sure nobody has been in there since you left so whatever you left in there should still be there."

"Thanks," I tell him. "If you don't mind, we're going to get some sleep. I haven't had any in almost two days and Zach has got only about an hour more then me."

"Go ahead, will Zach need a separate room?"

I look at Zach, he smirks down at me. "We're good. Zach keeps the nightmares away."

"Cam, tomorrow you'll tell me what happened, right? You know after…"

My smile slips off my face. "Of course. I'll tell you everything." As Zach and I get changed for bed he throws me a questioning glance. "Not now," I tell him. "Not tonight."

"Alright Gallagher Girl, but you'll have to tell me at some point."

I climb into bed then roll onto my side so that I'm facing him. I wait until he slips under the sheets beside me then wrap my arms around him. "I know, I just don't like to think about it much. James is a good guy, he saved me. He payed his price though, everybody that helped me payed their price. I didn't even know he was alive until tonight." I press my cheek against his chest. "I'll explain everything in the morning. I promise." The last thing I remember before falling asleep was a kiss that went on forever.


	28. Chapter 28

**A/N Hey everyone. I hope you like this chapter. For all you Zammie fans out there, this is your chapter. I know I don't focus on the Zammie as much as I could so before I draw this story to a close I thought I should give you a chapter devoted to you. Enjoy and please review because it really motivates me to write.**

It is 1:00am when somebody shakes me awake. Before my eyes are fully open they are pinned to the wall with my knee at their groin and my forearm presses against there windpipe. Zach is still sleeping as soundly as only a guy could and I am pinning a very terrified James against the wall. I let go of him so abruptly he stumbles forward without my weight to keep him up. I put my arm out to keep him from falling. When he regains his balance he looks at me with surprise. "Well that's new." He says.

I glance at a still sleeping Zach then back at James. "What the hell are you doing waking me up at one in the morning?" All I want to do is climb back into bed and curl up in the fold of Zach's body.

"Michael has a knife wound." He answers without shame.

I sigh. I had stayed here for about two weeks over the summer and while I had, I'd become their unofficial medic. I'd done everything from stitching knife wounds to cleaning and wrapping bullet wounds to setting bones and kissing booboo's better. Now that I was back, I shouldn't be surprised to be summoned in the middle of the night to heal a drug dealer with some wound inflicted by angry customers or gang members who have a score to settle. "Alright, just give me a minute." I say. I know Zach will freak out if he wakes up and I'm gone so I go and wake him up. He twists my arm to an impossible angle but lets go when he realizes it was only me. I rub my wrist.

"Cam, what are you doing awake." He groans. "Please don't tell me my mother is waiting outside with a gun and a grudge."

I laugh and cross the room to his back pack. "No, and here," I toss him some clothes. "I need to go stich a knife wound and if you're coming your going to have to wear more than boxers."

"Of course I'm coming Gallagher Girl, I can't wait to see you stich a wound. According to Bex, you're squeamish around blood."

"Okay, I am not squeamish around blood. The only time I was the least bit squeamish around blood was when Liz cut her arm for an experiment where she needed blood and her hand slipped and she cut through a couple veins and she lost so much blood it pooled at her feet and ruined her shoes, which she had borrowed from me. After the summer I had I'd be dead if I was the least bit squeamish around blood. "I add darkly.

Zach who has finish getting dressed put his arms around me. "After the summer you had I'm just glad you're not dead." He tries to kiss me but I twist out of his arms and grab a sweater. I smirk at him and he grins. "Don't use my smirk against me Gallagher Girl, I own that smirk."

I laugh and turn to James who is standing by the door. "Lead the way."

* * *

Michael is in the dining room on the table. He is conscious and responsive and is talking with some of the other guys who all simultaneously gasp when they see me.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm not dead, you all missed me. Right know I have to help another one of you who got stabbed on a drug run."

Michael looks at me. "Actually Cam, I fell on my knife."

I groan. "Great." Zach and the rest of the guys laugh at my irritation and so I do my best to ignore them as I start cleaning out Michael's wound with the medical alcohol somebody had put on the table. When I'm done I pick up a needle and thread that have also been left on the table and start sewing. To his credit, Michael doesn't make a sound and doesn't move once the whole time. Once I've wrapped the wound, I glare at the group of men surrounding me. "If you'll excuse me, I'm going back to bed now. In the morning, you can all explain how you've survived without me and," I look pointedly at Michael," how you managed to fall on your knife." As I pass Zach he grabs my hand and, together, we walk back to our room and climb into bed.

When I wake up in the morning, Zach is gone. I am very close to losing it when my hand brushes a note on his pillow.

Hey Cam,

Don't freak out or anything. I'm in the kitchen. Sorry I didn't wake you up, you looked so peaceful sleeping. Come on down and get some breakfast once you're ready.

Love you,

Zach.

I smile. He is so sweet. Also, I smell bacon which means he is making me breakfast. I roll out of bed, throw my hair into a pony tail and walk to the kitchen. Zach is standing at the grill making enough bacon and eggs to feed an army and the guys that are staying here right now are sitting at the same table where I stitched up Michael earlier this morning. I lean against the door frame and watch them all until Zach looks up and notices me standing there.

"Morning Gallagher Girl. How'd you sleep?" He asks.

"Not one nightmare, the only interruption I got was when I was summoned for some first aid." I look pointedly at the guys clustered around the table.

"Cheer up Cam, Zach made you breakfast." James says with a huge grin.

"And it wasn't my fault that I fell on my knife," Michael pipes up, "Kyle pushed me and it slipped out of my pocket."

I turn to glare at Kyle who is an extremely tattooed French guy with an Irish accent because he lived there for ten years. "You are the reason I was woken up a one in the morning for reasons completely unrelated to terrorism?"

He shrugs. "Guilty, also have I mentioned how nice you look this fine morning or how much we all missed you?"

I smile. "Forgiven, and I missed you guys too."

Zach looks at me. "You better sit down, the bacon is almost done and the eggs will be done in a minute."

I give him a kiss on my way to the table. "You're a good boyfriend."

He smirks as he sets the cooked food down at the center of the table. "I know."

I take a bite of bacon as he sits down beside me. "Scratch that, you're a great boyfriend."

His smirk widens, "I know that too."

"You're also a cocky boyfriend."

Zach doesn't even get a chance to reply before every guy around the table looks up and chorus's, "got that right."

I grin. "I really, really missed you guys."

* * *

After breakfast, Zach and I go back to our room. Zach has already showered and gotten dressed but I still need to do both. I throw a pad of paper and a pen at Zach, who is lying on the bed and tell him to write down everything he knows about the Circle and how it operates, then I walk into our ensuite. After stripping of my pajamas, I get into the shower, which still houses my razor, shampoo and conditioner from the summer. When I'm done, I grab a towel from a pile of them in the corner and dry myself off then wrap it around me. I walk out into our bedroom and grab some workout gear because I can't find anything else in the drawer of stuff I'd left here when I made my hasty exit in the summer, and the clothes in my pack are dirty. Without thinking, I drop the towel and walk over to my pack to get some underwear. I put it on and turn around to find Zach staring at me.

"What?" I say defensively, very aware of the fact that I'm only wearing underwear. "I forgot you where in here." He continues to stare and I make a face at him before crossing over to where I had put my clothes on the floor and pulling the sports bra and yoga pants on.

Zach shrugs. "Naked girls tend to cause staring in teenage boys," he informs me with a smirk.

I glare at him but relent when he pulls me onto the bed and into his lap and begins tickling me. "Stop it," I beg. "Zach stop it."

He stops but only to kiss me. When he pulls away he smiles. "You know I love you, right?"

"I know, and I love you more."

He pushes me onto my back, trapping me under him. "Not possible," he says.

Zach is about to kiss me when somebody opens our door. I sigh and wiggle out from under him to face a blushing James. "Uh… sorry," he mutters. "I was just coming to see if you guys need anything from the store. Kyle is going grocery shopping."

Michael pops up behind him. "They might need some condoms," he says with a grin. I throw a pencil at him.

"We're good, thanks."

"Actually," says Zach, "could you get Kyle to by some cookie dough ice-cream? I think better when I'm eating it."

James grins, "I'll tell him, in the mean time, shouldn't you and Cammie figure out some way to get the Circle?"

I look at him and Zach. "I have an idea," I say.


	29. Chapter 29

**A/N So hi. Long time no see. Thank you all for your patience in waiting for my update. I know what you're thinking. She makes us wait more than two weeks and she say sorry? Yes, I do. Now then, as it is summer my updates will probably be less frequent and further apart. After this update, there probably won't be one for about another two weeks again because I am going camping with my family, than to camp. I apologize in advance. In answer to a review by AlexandraGallagher, yes I have changed my pen name. It used to be booklover777 and it is now You-Just-Might. Please review because it really helps me find inspiration to keep writing. Until next time, bye. **

I explain my idea and nobody looks very optimistic. I admit, I think it's a long shot but it's all we've got. I've learned to like bad plans, love good ones, and gotten really good at impromptu ones. In any case, we'll be prepared. Our plan is roughly this.

Lure all head members of the Circle to a Circle like meeting place.

Immobilize them so that they can be detained by the CIA.

If that fails, wing it.

Okay. It barley qualifies as a plan, so sue me. It's all we've got and we're running out of time. If we stay here much longer Catherine will find us. As it is, she probably already knows where we are. She's probably had this place under surveillance for weeks. I decide it would be better not to voice that thought.

Zach's voice breaks my train of thought. "How the hell are we supposed to lure all of the head members of the Circle to one place?"

I look at him irritably. We've been arguing over this plan (or lack thereof) for hours now and my patience is worn thin. "Is it not obvious?" Both he and James stare at me blankly. "Come on guys, what has Catherine been after for over a year? Who does the circle need to kill in order to ensure that nobody else discovers who runs the organization?"

"You," says James unsmiling.

"Me," I echo. "They need me."

"So what?" Says Zach brokenly. "After everything, you'll just give yourself over to them? You'll just be the bait and hope it all turns out okay?"

"Yeah Zach," I snap. "That's right. I'm going to be the bait and I'll just hope it turns out all right because there isn't another option."

"There is always another option," he yells standing now.

I jump up from where I'd been seated. "Yeah? Do you see one? I am tired of running Zach. I can't leave school without constantly looking over my shoulder and when I'm at school, all I can think is how the longer I stay there with the people I love, the more likely it is they'll die because of me. Zach, I can barely live with the blood I have on my hands now, I can't have their blood on my hands too." I'm yelling as well now but it's not out of anger. It's out of grief and fear. I turn away from him, not wanting him or James to see the pain I know will be etched across my face. "I can't have your blood on my hands too," I say quietly, then head off to our room and go to bed.

* * *

_I'm lying on my bed, trying to ignore the pain in my legs when Catherine and some guy I've never seen come in._

_"Cammie, Cammie, Cammie." Catherine says in a singsong voice._

_I turn my head and glare at her. "Something I can do for you Catherine or are you just down here for some conversation? I must say, I'm not up to date with the current gossip._

_The man barks a laugh. "Your right Catherine, she's just like her father."_

_I fly at him forgetting the chain around my ankle and land on my knees at Catherine's feet. She kicks me and I look up at her, blood trickling from my now split lip. I climb to my feet and work up a mouth full of saliva and blood then spit it in her face and watch with satisfaction as it dribbles down her chin. "Don't speak of my father. You have no right to speak of my father you bitch."_

_She slaps me and I return the favour. She grabs my arm, twisting it to the point it breaks. "I have the right to do whatever I wish Cammie, and I will do whatever I want." She pushes me onto my bed and sits down on a chair in a corner of my room. "So, how is my little son? I haven't asked you that yet. How is Zach?"_

_A wave of fear washes through me and even though I do my best to mask it I know she sees it. "He's fine," I say stiffly._

_"I'm sure," she says, then pulls out a knife. I don't remember what happens next, just the pain and how hard it was to say nothing, to not break. She pulls away after a while and turns to walk out of the room. "Bring the girl," she says to the man, "show her what happens to spies who don't talk."_

_He carries me out the door and up the cellar stairs into the kitchen; I'm too tired to fight. I see Charlie sitting at the kitchen table and he gives me a sympathetic look but I know he can't help me._

_Catherine is waiting at the door. "Set her down. The least we can do is bring her to her father."_

_She sprints the whole way and I do too, refusing to reveal any ounce of weakness in her presence even though it hurts like hell. When we get there she grins, stopping at the top of the hill so that I have a full view of the clearing below. I swallow hard, knowing in my heart what is below me, who is below me. The least we can do is take her to her father, she had said. I run down the hill and drop to my knees beside a roughly dug grave that could only hold the bones of my father. They killed him. I want to let the grief take me but I know I can't. I mustn't show any weakness. I can't. God I wish I could, but I can't so I suffer in silence._

_After a moment I turn my head to look at Catherine who is still grinning from the top of the hill. "Is this what you wanted to show me? My father's grave? Did you think it would break me? He has been gone since I was ten," I spit at her. "I have been to his funeral, I have cried late at night because he won't ever walk me down the aisle at my wedding or be at my graduation. He will never hold his grandchildren close or hug me again. I have grieved for him already Catherine."_

_Her smile disappears as does her confidence and she turns to anger. She pulls out a whip and I see her swing her arm, feel it hit my skin again and again. I'm screaming, I know I am but I can't stop myself. I let myself grieve for my father through the screams that Catherine will interpret as acknowledgement of the pain she is inflicting on my body. A voice that doesn't fit on this mountain, in this place, is calling for me. "Cammie. Cammie," the voice calls. It's Zach. "Cammie, wake up," he shouts, but I can't wake up. I can't forget, I can't pull out of my memory and so it continues. I feel the whip and I try to run, I try to get away but I'm too weak. I try to get my eyes to focus on Catherine and succeed in getting a blurry view._

_"You...will… never… never… break… me." I get out through the pain. I clench my jaw. "Never." Then I black out._

* * *

I wake up screaming to find my arms and legs restrained by Zach who is on top of me on our bed trying to keep me from moving. He has tears in his eyes. I don't want to see his pain so I close my eyes again. I can't stop screaming, I can't stop. I'm screaming and crying at once and Zach is trying to calm me down. He is telling me that everything is okay but it isn't because my daddy is dead and Catherine is alive and she had me, she had me but she didn't break me. I stop screaming because she didn't break me and I'm still here. I'm still here and Zach is here and he is safe. Safe. I open my eyes because I'm safe and Zach's safe and we're both still here. Zach gets off of me, sensing I'm not going to hurt anybody. He sits up and pulls my shaking body onto his lap.

"He's gone Zach," I say sadly. "He's gone."

"I know baby," he murmurs, his lips on my forehead. "I heard. You where talking out loud."

"Who else heard?"

"Nobody, I made them all leave the room when I realized what was happening. We all came running the first time we heard you scream, I was on my way to bed so I was here first."

I am barely registering his words because all I can see is Catherine and all I can hear is that whip. I press my hands to my ears. "Make it stop, Zach make it stop."

"How? He asks me.

"I don't know, just make it stop."

He kisses me, once, twice, three times and I let myself sink into him, leaving behind my pain, my grief, my thoughts. It feels good. He tries to pull away but I won't let him. I pull his shirt over his head and run my fingers down his chest, letting them rest at the waistband of his jeans. He groans and pulls me closer, then pulls my shirt over my head and tosses it onto the ground beside our bed. I reach back and unclasp my bra, hearing his sharp intake of breath when he sees my bare skin. He kisses me again, his hands on my hips. I don't think it is possible for us to be closer to each other. I finger the button to his jeans, wondering if we should go further, not wanting to stop but knowing we should. He kisses me again and I kiss him back, deciding that I don't care anymore whether or not I should do something. I don't want to think, it feels so nice to not think, to forget for a minute. I had though I would never want to forget anything again but I would give anything to forget for just another minute. Zach kisses my neck, my collar bone. He draws a line of kisses down to my stomach then back up again. I sigh… and my door bursts open to reveal a very worried looking James.

"Cammie, is she all right?" He nearly shouts. He sees us and blushes. "Uh… I'll take that as a yes. Maybe those condoms weren't a bad idea after all." He adds rather unnecessarily.

Zach sits up trying to shield my body from James view. "Shut up would you."

"Yeah, yeah. " He answers.

I glare at him from over Zach's shoulder and trying not to let my voice waver say, "get out of our room."

"Oh, right. Well see you two tomorrow. We should probably finalize the plan to take down the Circle. Night."

He leaves and I give Zach one last kiss before stripping off the rest of my clothing and pulling on some pajama's. I head to the bathroom to brush my teeth and when I return find Zach sitting on top of the covers in his boxers.

"Are you sure you're okay?" He asks.

I crawl under the covers and he follows suit. "I'll be fine," I tell him. "I love you, you know that right?"

"I know," he tells me. "I love you too." With those words ringing in my head, I go back to sleep.


	30. Chapter 30

**A/N Sorry guys, that was longer than two weeks. To make up for it, I have posted a one shot called Dark and Terrible Things. Feel free to check it out. As always, R&R and enjoy. **

**PS- Chapter 30. Wow, I promise it will end very soon.**

Running, always running. We left the mansion a week ago when it became clear that if we stayed there any longer we would be leaving with our friend's dead around us and guns at our backs. Needless to say, we got out of there quickly. I sigh as I hear a gunshot resonating against the walls of the tunnel they are chasing us through. They are Circle members of some sort but I don't know if they belong to Catherine and her splinter group or the rest of the COC. The gunshot is loud. I'm not particularly worried about the noise: we're in a bad part of Paris where gunshots are heard so often that most go unreported to the police. Still, we can't have the authorities on the lookout for us because they could blow the whole operation before we even have a chance to put it in action.

I see an alley off to the side and tug Zach's hand pulling him into it with me. I motion quietly to a fire escape hanging on the wall and watch with satisfaction as Zach climbs up. When he is at the top, he motions for me to follow. I'm a quarter of the way up the ladder when I heat a sound below me. I look down to a perfect view of two men and three women with their guns pointed at my face. I sigh again in irritation this time and glare at Zach, clearly telling him to stay where he is, then I let go of the ladder. I land in a crouch at the base of the ladder and look up at our tails/murderers/kidnappers.

"Hi, I'm Cammie," I get up and stick out my hand, "do you work for Catherine or for the intact part of the COC?" I ask with a smile. They gape at me but say nothing. "Alright then. What is your purpose tonight, murder or capture? You see, it would kind of help me decide whether or not to kill you if I know whether or not you wanted to kill me."

"You are going to kill us? You're just a little girl. Catherine warned us you'd try this." Says one of the men whom I immediately dub Dumbo due to the fact that he just revealed to me not only that they worked for Catherine but that they are also low level grunts that she wouldn't tell who I am and what I can do, nor that I have Zach with me.

"Is that so? Well if I'm just a harmless little girl, it wouldn't hurt to tell me what you're going to do to me, would it?"

Dumbo, who I think is the leader of this group of idiots glances at one of the women who gives an almost unnoticeable nod. Well unnoticeable if you're not a spy. It would seem she is the one calling the shots. I look at her carefully, taking in her posture, stance and grip on the gun. She looks totally at ease but I can see fear in her eyes. She carries herself with dignity, not like a low level grunt would, and her grip on her gun is perfect and steady as is her stance. I look at the gun. It is different from the others, I can't pin point how but it is. I don't understand until she talks.

"We have been ordered to kill you." Says the woman stiffly. My face stays blank but my thoughts fly. I know that voice and it doesn't belong to a low level grunt of Catherine's. It belongs to a very high level agent of the COC who reports to the heads of the organization.

A way to carry out our plan forms in in my head. "Well then I will have to kill you first." I say and without further warning shoot the three who haven't spoken through the neck, hitting the brain stem. They drop immediately. I turn to look at both Dumbo and Not Catherine's. They both have their mouths open and fear in their eyes. "Go back to Catherine. Tell her it wouldn't be a good idea for her to kill me just yet. Also to send some higher level people next time. This was insulting."

"We can't go back, she'll hurt us," stutters Dumbo.

I pull my shirt over my head, showing of the scars on my stomach and arms. "Believe me, I know, but if you don't go I promise you...I'll do worse." Then I turn to the fire escape and start climbing. When I reach the top, they are gone.

* * *

Twenty minutes later Zach and I are sitting on an actual bed in an actual room in an actual motel. So what if the motel happens to offer by the hour prices for rooms and the sheets look like they haven't been washed in months, we've spent every night the past week sleeping under bridges or abandoned buildings and on a particularly bad day, in a dumpster. I sigh in content as I lay back on a pillow. Zach does the same then slides an arm around me.

"Why did you let those two people live?" He asks after a moment.

"The woman didn't work for Catherine, but the man did." I answer. "The woman works for the rest of the circle. The man is just a low level agent with whom Catherine will do what she wants. Both of them will be on their way to report to their respective masters and mistresses right now so all we have to do is wait and taunt."

Zach, although looks kind of surprised, smirks. "That's why I love you Gallagher Girl, always one step ahead of the game." He kisses me.

I don't return his kiss but instead pull away, a sudden sense of shame filling me. "No, Zach, I'm not a step ahead of the game. I'm just a better bad guy then Catherine. The only way I have left to fight her is to be her." With that, I roll over and go to sleep.

* * *

I wake up to a gun to my head. A voice tells me to keep my hands up and kneel on the floor, I comply, but first reach into the pockets of the jeans I had never changed out of and press a button on the phone in the back pocket. It is programmed to send GPS coordinates to Liz's favorite laptop and Macey's phone along with an SOS message, all encoded of course. As I roll onto the floor, I notice that Zach is already kneeling on it, his hands in the air, his eyes fixed on one person. I give a small gasp when I see who it is, even though I knew she'd be here, knew she'd want to be the one to take me or kill me.

"Catherine, how are you? Have you updated the security of your Paris stronghold, it was almost too easy to escape." It is harder than it looks to sound condescending from below the person you're trying to look down on.

She sighs. "Shut up Cammie." Then I see a pole and then nothing. The last thing I remember is hearing Zach cry out, then a thud as his body hits the ground.


	31. Chapter 31

**A/N Hey, sorry I took so long to update. There is probably only two chapters left before the end of this story, maybe one if I decide not to do an epilogue, but I will not post the next chapter until I get at least ten reviews. Now I know how irritating that is, I feel the same way when I see that on somebody else's A/N but I only got three reviews last chapter and it really wasn't enough to motivate me to write the next chapter and so the writing of this chapter felt like a chore rather than fun. with that in mind, please review. Until next time.**

**XOXO~You-Just-Might **

When I come to, I'm tied to a support pole inside a warehouse. Zach is slumped on the floor in front of me, still unconscious. His face is bruised and there is a cut just above his eye brow still bleeding. I cringe at seeing it and begin to struggle against my bonds. I hear a cold laugh and a chair scrapes on the floor as the person sitting on it gets up.

"Cammie, Cammie. When will you learn? Killing my agents and taunting me, it ultimately ends in your capture or surrender every time."

"Catherine, do you ever get tired of killing people or torturing people all day long?"

"No, not really," she answers without missing a beat. Then she smirks. She smirks Zach's smirk.

"So, are you going to clue me into your master plan on getting me to spill all my secrets?"

"No, I'm going to show you." She comes toward me and I brace myself for the first strike. It never comes, instead I see her foot connect with Zach's stomach, here him groan and curl in on himself. I yell and Catherine laughs. "Time to wake up Zach, say hi to mommy."

He groans again and his eyes fly open. "Catherine." He struggles to get to his feet. "What do you want?"

"Don't you mean mom?"

"No, I don't. What do you want?"

"Well, I want Cammie to talk and you are going to make that happen. You see son, I've finally realized that Cammie isn't going to talk if I torture her, but maybe if I torture the person she loves the most, she'll talk. You know, this whole thing, her running from me, from school, from you. It has all been to protect the people she loves."

I glare at Catherine's back from my place tied to the post, I'm so scared for Zach, so scared of what Catherine will do to get me to talk. I know I can't let her see it though so I decide to act cocky, uncaring, bored. I cough. "Hello? Still here. Actually I've been here the whole time and Catherine? I don't think I like you're plan much." Zach's head swivels in my direction and his mouth falls open. I know I must look like hell, I can feel blood in my hair and I'm pretty sure my jaw is bruised but it doesn't account for his gaping, I try to put it out of my head and smile at Catherine who looks about ready to kill me. "Would you just untie me and we can leave? It'll save you some time Catherine, I'm not going to talk."

"You will Cammie, I promise you, you will."

Then Catherine pulls out a knife from the folds of her coat and starts and all I see is the pain on Zach's face and the blood on the floor and all I hear is his screams and my screams and Catherine's laughter. I close my eyes then, pretend that it isn't happening, pretend that Zach is okay and everything is fine, but it's not and so I silently pray that everything will turn out okay, everything will be fine and that Zach will forgive me because no matter what Catherine does, I can't tell her anything because there isn't anything to tell. There is nothing. My mind wanders to anything but what is happening in front of me until the rope tying me to the pole is cut. I fall to the ground, then run towards Catherine and Zach, paying no mind to who freed me, just knowing that I have to kill Catherine, that I need to save Zach. I kick the knife out of Catherine's hand then kick her in the stomach, the arm, the leg. My training goes out the window as my body goes on overdrive. The only thing I can think is how much pain I want to cause her, need to cause her. All of my frustration, anger, pain, sadness, every emotion she has ever caused me rise to the surface and I'm yelling, shouting at her, angry words, words full of loathing and grief and pain and sadness and hate. I remember I'm a spy then and get a hold on my emotions, turning in one second from the little girl who misses her father to the Chameleon who got caught and learned what it took to stay alive. Every punch I throw is cool and calculated, every kick has meaning. Catherine is up off the ground now and fighting back, but she is not as angry as I am, the only thing at stake here is her pride and her life but she has already destroyed my life and I have nothing left to lose but the person lying on the floor in front of us, struggling to get up, to help me and so I tell him to stay where he is, that I'm fine, but unlike yesterday on the roof he doesn't listen and struggles against himself harder.

I'm distracted looking at Zach and Catherine must see an opening in my guard because the next thing I know, I'm on the ground and she has a forearm across my throat.

"Face it Cammie, you're beaten." Catherine says with a cocky smile.

"Not yet," I return. "Did I ever tell you about that nun I met the first time I was in Paris? She taught me a thing or two, illegal moves but I doubt anybody will care as you're a terrorist."

Then I spit in her face and in her momentary distraction, pull one of my arms free of her grasp and slam my palm into the bottom of her nose, putting enough pressure on the bone to push it up far enough that she would be paralyzed for a few seconds but that it wouldn't kill her. By the time I have gotten out of her grasp and straightened myself out, she is up again. I know I should have gotten her well she was down but there seems to be something wrong with attacking somebody who can't do anything to defend themselves, even if that somebody is Catherine. As she comes at me again, I know that we are evenly matched, that only the element of surprise will let me win this fight. She punches my nose and I hear it break, feel the blood gushing down my face. Catherine keeps coming though and I kick her in the stomach, she just grunts and kicks me in the shin. I fall to one knee and she comes in to finish me off, aiming a kick at my stomach. My hands come up, trapping her foot against my body. I go into a back roll, using my momentum to pull her with me. I land on top of her, her leg bent up between our bodies, her arms trapped beneath her body, my forearm on her neck, my other hand pushing against the side of her head. If I put any more pressure on her head, her neck will snap. Catherine stares at me, her eyes wide.

"This is for my father," I whisper. Then I twist her head to the side and watch as the life drains from her eyes.

Somebody is clapping in the background and I whip around to be faced with 13 leaders of the circle. **(A/N I don't know how many of them were listed at the end of OSOT because my Kobo isn't working and the internet proved useless so for our purposes we are going to say 17 in total.)**

"That was impressive," says a large man I don't recognize.

"Yes," Mr. Winters says, steeping out from behind the man. "That was impressive Cammie, I don't think I've seen anybody best Catherine Goode in single unarmed combat ever. Even more impressive is that you killed her."

"You're dead," I tell him. "I saw you die, I took the crap I got for letting you die instead of taking you into custody. You are dead."

"Well Cammie, that's news to me. As you can see I am very much alive."

"But...how?" I say, all sense of sophistication and deadliness leaving me for a moment.

"Cam, I am a leader of the Circle of Cavan, do you really think some of Catherine's thugs could kill me?"

"Yes," I say frankly, "but seeing as they failed to complete the job, I guess I will."

"Umm… no." Says a voice from behind me.

I turn to see who it is and am greeted with the business end of a gun trained between my eyes. "Well shit." I say to the woman at the other end of it. "Would people stop doing that to me? It's the second time today."

"Go stand beside your boyfriend." She says, not even offering an apology for sticking a gun in my face.

"Gladly," I say, deciding I'm pissed and hoping that Macey or Liz got my message and coordinates and will be here very, very soon with a hoard of CIA and MI6 agents. "You never know how much time you have left in life to stand beside your boyfriend, especially when you're me, but I don't think I will. In fact I think I feel like being difficult." Then I slam my hand into the base of her nose, driving the bone into her brain and killing her. As she falls to the ground, I grab her gun from the floor where she dropped it when she died and spin to face a very shocked looking group of Circle leaders. "Who's next?" I ask and raise the gun, knowing that I'll never win this fight but vowing to try. Then the windows and old sky lights shatter and I smile, knowing that my back up is here.


	32. Chapter 32

**A/N Wow. Last chapter. First off I would like to thank all of you who reviewed throughout the course of this story. You are the reason there was more than one chapter. I would also like to apologize to Sydney and Guest along with anybody else who my request for reviews may have offended. I am sorry. Also, Sydney and Guest, you will notice that your reviews where deleted. The reason for that is that although I appreciate constructive criticism (or even just insults) about my writing, I do not appreciate having my personality insulted especially seeing as you have never met me, there for have no right to insult myself as a person. There for, thank you for your opinions but in the future please don't say anything. Other than that, enjoy and please feel free to review one last time. Thanks for letting me right for you!**

**XOXO - You-Just-Might**

I feel the falling glass cut my upturned face. I can smell the sharp tang of blood but I don't shield my face. I don't try to protect myself but instead smile as I see my friends and teachers spill into the room that just moments before I thought I would die in. The gun in my hand feels hot but I don't drop it, only tighten my grip and hope for the best. When the glass stops falling and my allies feet hit the ground, I know that we might have a chance after all. I look around and see the majority of my class looking back at me as I point a gun at the shocked group of Circle leaders, not to mention a man who's supposed to be dead.

"Hi," I say as though I do this everyday, which lets face it, isn't a far stretch. I take in who came and see all of the faculty excluding Dr. Fibs who must have stayed behind to watch the younger students. Even Joe is here. Most of the senior class is here as well, I see Tina, Anna and many others but my heart almost breaks when I see Liz, Macey, Preston and Bex standing off to the side, their eyes boring into mine. I smile at them and silently thank whoever made it so that they got my message in time. I try to ignore the fact that somebody as undertrained as Preston is standing with them.

"Hey," says my Mom. "Anything we can do to help?"

"Actually, if somebody could make sure Zach is okay, that would be great." I say, my eyes trained on the men and women I have at gunpoint.

"I'm good Cam." Zach says, coming up beside me, a gun in his hand as well. "Thanks for killing my mother baby." He adds, squeezing my arm with one hand.

"Anytime." I grin. "So," I say to my dear friends from the Circle. "You have made the last year of my life a living hell and although I would love to thank each and every one of you with a bullet to the brain stem -and believe me, I would like that very much- I have to hand you over to the CIA so that they can do with you as they see fit. Whether that be torture, death or a life time of imprisonment, I don't care. I've gotten my revenge. Catherine is dead and I got to kill her. Although I would love to continue with that theme, I don't feel like explaining that as I debrief so all thirteen of you are going to come peacefully with us and you will be delivered in one piece to the CIA headquarters in DC."

"I don't think that'll fly sweetheart," says a voice I recognize well.

"Will," I gasp. Of all the people in this room, I'm only truly afraid of him. I can't let him see though. "I take it you where a spy. How is it that Catherine didn't realize who you where?"

"Oh well, you know…" he grins wickedly. "Rape a few captives and you win trust easily enough. I can't say I didn't enjoy it though, god you where good. You fought me every step of the way, the way you twisted and kicked and screamed, it was great." He steps forward and touches my face, running his fingers over my jaw. I'm paralyzed. "Lets do it again sometime." He says. Then a gun goes off, not mine, and he falls to the ground, blood running down his side.

Zach steps up to him with his gun raised. "That's my girlfriend you bastard," he says, a homicidal gleam in his eyes. Then he shoots him once more and he dies.

I want to sit down and cry, to have Zach's arms around me, but I can't. If I show weakness, it is over. I tear my eyes from Will's corpse and look at the group of Circle leaders again, wondering why they haven't attacked yet, Do the enjoy banter? I try for a peaceful no death or fighting solution one more time. "Correction, the twelve of you will come peacefully to be detained by the CIA."

"What Will said," Mr. Winters grins. "That's not going to fly sweetheart."

After that its a blur, I throw punches and bullets, I kick and I twirl, always making sure Zach is beside me. Then I hear an agonized scream and whirl towards it, knowing something is wrong. You know how some people swear that when a loved one died, they felt it, that they knew it happened? I knew. I knew before I saw that curly blonde hair turned red with blood, before I heard those gasping, hysterical sobs that I didn't know I was capable of, before I turned on the woman standing over my little Lizzy with blood on her hands and beat her until her body was unrecognizable, fuelled by a rage that came from somewhere deep inside of me that I didn't know existed. Before strong hands pulled me away and a voice I love told me over and over again that she was dead, that they where both dead. Before I sobbed into Zach's arms as people fought around us. Before it ended and before we won. At least they said we'd won, but they never said what we lost.

I knew before they handed me a medal and called me a hero. Before the world found out that an agent of the CIA had brought down a terrorist organization that had plagued our county for over a hundred years. I knew before I was named valedictorian of the graduating class of 2013 and before my boyfriend forced me out of bed to go to my best friend's funeral. I knew when Elizabeth Sutton died. Nobody will tell me why. Why my best friend is dead. Why for weeks afterward it was a struggle to get out of bed in the morning. Why when it seemed like I might finally beat them, the Circle took one of the things I'd been fighting to protect, the lives of the people I loved. Why when the rest of the world called me a hero, I was perpetually stuck in an abandoned warehouse standing in front of curly blonde hair turned red with blood. Day after day, month after month, I knew. It got easier though. They washed Lizzy's hair for her funeral and it was just blonde curls again. They buried her in her favourite E=mc2 pyjama's. Her strictly civilian parents became not so strictly civilian parents and her younger sister came to Gallagher as a seventh grader. I got out of bed every morning knowing that Zach would be waiting on the other side of the door to help me through the day and one morning, I realized it didn't hurt so much. Bex and Macey slowly healed as well but both of them did their best to hide their grief from me. My mother spoke at Liz's funeral, she said that even though Liz wasn't the first sister we'd lost, she brought the worst grief in her passing. That she had been a genius with a mini van that could go over 500mph, that she'd been a loyal friend and had given everything to protect her country. There wasn't a dry eye.

The Circle leaders have been imprisoned without trial and are all on death row. Although we are still meeting some resistance from the tattered remains of the Circle, they've pretty much crumbled without direction. Mr. Winter's had had a heart to heart with his son from opposite sides of bullet proof glass that had ended with Preston making a rude hand gesture and vulgar comment about what his father could do with his apologies and honor and then walked out of the room. Joe's been reinstated as Covert Affairs Prof. and shares the job with Abby. And me? I'm trying to patch up my relationship with my mother and enjoy the one I have with Zach... in between seeing my friends of course. We graduated last week, but there was an empty place at our table. A hole in our hall. In the end, there was a grave, a defeat and a victory. I never saw it coming.


	33. Hey guess what?

**A/N Okay, wow. I wasn't expecting that. About ten minutes after I first posted the final chapter of this story, I had a review begging for more. An hour later I looked at my email again and had another. So guess what? Sequel time. The sequel will be called When The Tables Turn and I should have the first chapter up tonight. If you followed, read, favorited (if that's a word) or reviewed this story even once, please check it out. Well until next time. **

**Bye for now. You-Just-Might**


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